I love a guy, but I don’t even hope for reciprocity

I'm almost 17.5 years old, and I've never kissed before, and I haven't had a real relationship. And this is because I have been in love with one person for more than a year, but this is my friend. I desperately want a relationship with him, but since he is 8 years older than me, he still considers me a child and is not going to reciprocate.

On the one hand, we are friends, we communicate well, but on the other hand, at night I just cry. Before my eyes, this person, one might say, is dating someone else, and it is very painful to see this. And I'm constantly in some kind of trap. I am glad that this is almost my best friend (he also said this), but I understand that he, one might say, has someone with whom he is dating and I understand that I am incredibly jealous of her.

It seems like there are so many people around, good ones too, but I’m fixated and think only about one person, and I don’t even want to imagine myself with others right now. Because of this, I have never really had anything with anyone before. test-antibiotic.com It's quite difficult to understand what to do now. Just wait for it to pass? Do you understand that there is still much to come?