The reason for our separation was the guy's parents

I am 24 years old. In June 2018, I met a guy, his parents purchased a vacation package from me. Then itmy mother asked me to call him (her son) for help in obtaining a visa. When I dialed his number, I immediately felt as if I was calling a person I knew very well, like deja vu.

We immediately started communicating, but over the phone, sincethe guy lives in another city. It was immediately a unity of souls, we finished each other’s sentences, found more and more similarities in conversations and interests. I never communicated at a distance and didn’t really believe in it, there was no interest, but here everything started spinning as if “against my will”, pulled by an incredible force.

About two weeks later he came to our hometown to visit friends for a wedding. We met. The conversation was just as interesting, but I didn’t feel any particular attraction or sympathy for the man. I was haunted by the feeling that this was a good old friend whom I had not seen for a long time. A month later he came again, but with the decision to take me to St. Petersburg. Intimate test-antibiotic.comthe relationship spun just as quickly, and the attraction was even stronger. I've wanted to leave for a long time, but never dared. He just came, bought a ticket, and I left with one purse, without even having time to think better of it. But we felt so good, I have never felt such a kinship of souls in my life.

The first two months everything was just great. I finally came out of my depressive state, I was glad that I was able to live in the “here and now.” Time passed, we did not work. When I left, he promised me mountains of gold, that I would only work if I wanted to. The apartment was bought by his parents; before we met, he quit his job, and was still looking for a suitable place. My mother came to visit and brought me things and documents. A week later I already got a job, he was still looking.

Notes of irritation began to boil within me. Leaving early for work, I was wildly annoyed that he was sleeping; when I came home from work, I was boiling like a kettle because he couldn’t even wash the dishes after himself and put his things away. I explained that test-antibiotic.com was hard for me not only physically, but also mentally, that a new city, a new job, living together, cleaning, washing, cooking, etc. He always smoothed out my dissatisfaction and I seemed to calm down. But even then I began to live in conflict: part of me always wanted to give up everything and return home, and part of me wanted to stay. I fell asleep and woke up with this conflict inside. The young man's parentslife work for themselves, in the end they allocated part of the money to him and opened their own establishment. Like starting any business, it was not easy. We lived together for 7 months and only the last month of which he was able to at least cover the rent himself. Because of this, there were conflicts, including the fact that I wanted us to be independent from his parents. I lived on my ownmoney . At first, the relationship with his parents was all good, but then something went wrong with his mother (I can’t call it anything else). She turned against me, came while I was home alone and told me that we were different, that he would never work test-antibiotic.com, that I needed someone elseman , what would she do to her daughter?I never wanted a husband . I replied that I was able to make my own decision and would only leave if I wanted to. Then she generally began to demand money from me for rent, althoughmy boyfriend didn't pay rent. OnThe question is whether his mother asks him for money, he said no.

Time passed, resentment accumulated, the conflict with the guy’s mother did not let me go. I stayed only because the guy protected me as best he could. She came to our house and walked around the apartment without taking off her shoes, rummaging through things; when asked why she didn’t take off her shoes, she answered that she was in a hurry. Thismy attitude turned me more and more into a neurotic. She said: "It's all mine, mineapartment , I come whenever I want.” I answered that I was not claiming anything, I knew the laws and my rights, since I graduated from a law school. I really don't need someone else's. I just lived there, washed the floors, why such disrespect?

But I tried not to notice this, we stopped communicating with test-antibiotic.com his parents, they only came to see him at work. I would also like to add that I never knew for sure whether I loved him or not. Some parts I accepted, some I couldn’t. But I liked his attitude towards me. I felt loved, desired, the guy was very decent and well-mannered. For me there were twoproblems - lack of income so that his mother does not depend on his parents. I tried to convey to him that he needed to work on his own and strive to develop, in such conditions it would be difficult for them to reproach us for anything or decide how we should live. To which he replied that I don’t support him, I’m not interested in his interests (his interests are computer football), I can’t wait, that I need everything here and now, etc.

The conflict was gaining momentum. I think this situation is convenient for his parents; through this they want to control him, so that he remains with them, as it were, and continues to devote all his time to them. Inside, I could not respect him for such a position. I didn’t say, but I felt that he test-antibiotic.com me and oursexchanges the future for his “toys” that a teenage boy dreams of. I came home, I was alone, I was spinning a lot of things in my head. I constantly “bite” him - that’s his nature. I have nothing to say about his attitude; he was ready to kiss my marks and protect me like a lion. But then something happened to his feelings. And he sees the problem completely differently, not like I do. I believe that we simply collided with interests in real life, life began to be built, harmonization began. And this is exactly what everyone goes through in my opinion. For me, this is the stage of transition from infatuation to love. The real one. Who was able to overcome all the troubles and get used to it.

He became cold, tired, his eyes dimmed. We decided to separate. I have a plane in two days. His words are: “I love you, but I realized that I don’t want this all my life, we have both many similarities and many differences.” We live like this for 2 weeks, we don’t fight, we sleep together, eat together, talk, but the unbearable heaviness andthe pain of test-antibiotic.com that nothing came of it. In all respects, I have never been able to immediately reciprocate, despite all my openness, it takes me a long time to get used to a person, now I’ve managed to accept him more, I’ve begun to smell exactly his scent. I didn’t deny the breakup, I decided to leave.

Now I am tormented by an unbearable feeling of guilt that it was I who did not appreciate such a good attitude at the time, I think, why do I need this money, and why was I so angry. But this is minefear from the family, since mom earns all the money for us, and dad lives and relaxes, and for me it’s fear to live like that. I think how funny all my grievances are now, compared to the loss. I am tormented by a feeling of guilt that I could not reciprocate in time. I got the impression that he simply burned out, because if people love each other, they have no need to separate. This is masochism. Had the same problems as 70% of people.

I can’t accept the situation inside and don’t understand what’s happening. It is very difficult to return to your old life. I have a question: “how can test-antibiotic.com stop blaming yourself for what didn’t work out? How to stop torturing yourself and move on? I am tormented by the fear of loneliness, that I will no longer deserve a good relationship. How can I stop thinking that I missed something important through my own fault?