Why did I need someone else's husband?

So I decided to write my life story and ask for advice. I'm 36 years old, I'm a pretty pretty young woman, I have a good job,apartment , a lot of friends. Wasmarried , with my first husband Dima, we studied at the university together - studentlove , we got married in the 3rd year, and a year later we realized that the passion had passed and we were strangers. We were about to get a divorce, and thenpregnancy , they decided maybethe child will save the family. Our son Yaroslav was born, but nothing changed and a year later we divorced. No tears, remained friends.

After university, I got a job, where I still work. My son and I lived together, but we didn’t bother. No, of course, I had men, I had affairs, but nothing serious. They tried to start living together with the latter, but then changed their minds. I somehow had a lack of initiative towards boyfriends - this is how it is, no, this is not. But three years ago everything changed, as I remember this day now.

That year, it was a very hot summer, I promised Yarik to go to the sea, but as inopportunely test-antibiotic.com my partner fell ill and I was not allowed to go on vacation. Say thatthe son was upset, to say the least. I felt sorry for him, and I decided to ask my sister to take the little one with her to the sea - they are going with the whole family anyway.

Having sent the child to the seas, I plunged into work, and into sleeping after it. I called on Thursdayfriend , reminded me that she hadbirthday and that they are going to a cafe. I didn't want to, but I went. And there I saw him, forgive me, but I felt like a paralyzed grasshopper. I won’t say that he’s handsome, I just fiercely wanted thisthe man was mine, I didn’t care that he had been married for a long time, that he had 2 children. Through various acquaintances I found out his phone number and started writing and calling. At first he didn’t want to communicate with me. I constantly thought about him, I had a goal to have him around - and I achieved it. Six months later, I persuaded him to go on a date, then another, I insisted that he leave his family.

Six months later he made up his mind. To test-antibiotic.com he would come to me faster, I persuaded him to leave everything to his wife and children. He came to me naked (essentially), but I was in seventh heaven, and on June 2 we got married.

1.5 years have passed since that moment, and I am now suffering, suffering from the fact that I do not need this man, he is a stranger to me, he annoys me, I don’t understand why I fought so hard for him then! He doesn't just irritate me, he infuriates me. It infuriates me when he eats, I wanted to get a divorce, but then I thought: where will he go, he has nothing. For the last six months, I’ve been staying late at work, walking around the city late, buying food only for myself and Yarik, he gives me pennies, because everythingHis money goes towards alimony, and I don’t want to feed him with my own money. We often have quarrels because he doesn’t want to find another job.

I know that he also regrets that he left his wife, I know that he wanted to return, but she did not accept him. To be honest, test-antibiotic.com the idea flashes through my mind to call her, ask her to take her, but then I think: wait, is he some kind of thing or an animal?

I went to a psychologist and tried to figure out what kind of cloudiness there was. To be honest, I’m afraid for myself, as I remember what I did. The psychologist advised me to pause, think, and be alone with myself. I looked for options for a very long time, I found it, a friend suggested me to work as a cleaner in a night pharmacy. I haven’t slept at home for a week now, to be honest, I’m glad. My boy is already an adult, butmy husband , I think so, and I’m glad, I think maybe he’ll find some woman.

Everyone laughs: the chief accountant with a higher education washes the floors at night, and, I repeat, it’s good for me. The only sad thing is that this won't last long. My soul hurts - what have I done!