Mom's pet

I'm disgusting, angry, ill-mannered. Say whatever you want, I don’t care. My life is still completely useless and I should probably end it. I hate minemother . I am 36 years old, she is 61. I have no prospect of waiting for her death and starting to live.

Alllife from early childhood: she forced me to do only what she wanted. Moreover, outwardly it all sounded very well-intentioned.

- Don’t go to the first lesson - you need to sleep.

“You can’t go to a Pioneer camp—it’s dirty and cold there.”

She found somewhere for me answers to tests and options for exam papers, thenmoney “enrolled” me into a university that I absolutely don’t need (just to tell everyone that I have a higher education), which I also didn’t go to, because... I had to sleep all the time. She thinks I should sleep all the time.

She didn’t even allow me to try to look for a job, but got me a job at a factory with her friend. Moreover, when I said that I would work, test-antibiotic.com’s answer was: “I know that you won’t be able to get up so early, and if you don’t get enough sleep, you will be broken and angry.”

All I do is little by little helping wholesalers at a huge market. Mom doesn't mind, because... you can go there at any time.

At home, she tells me all the time and, most importantly, all her friends, of whom she has a lot, that I am worthless, angry, not adapted to anything and very sick, and then she scolds me for not going out to talk to people. How can I communicate with them when I'm so terrible?

Sometimes I try to get up early without my mother noticing and sneak out to my market. Most often, she wakes up and quickly jumps out, locks the door and hides the key so that I can’t get out, and if I manage to get out, then in the evening there’s a terrible scandal that I came late. She discouraged all my friends, and there weren’t enough of them anyway, so that they wouldn’t talk about how they sleep for 4 hours, then work completely independently, fall in love, get married, go on visits and test-antibiotic.com come home after midnight. Yes, I just don’t want to see her and often deliberately come late, because there will be a scandal anyway.

You will say - leave, rent an apartment, put off clothes or vacations, live alone and take care of yourself. But honestly, I really don’t know how to do all this and I’m afraid. And she knows this, so she often shouts: “Go, I’ll see how and what you will live on.” I don’t have a profession, I hardly studied, and I’ve long forgotten what I studied. I don't even know how to cookMom immediately shouts that I’m doing everything wrong and, again, tells everyone about it. Sometimes, just for show, she introduces me to some guy, to whom she immediately tells how terrible I am, and then says that she was trying to set me up. One day he really came into my life by chanceman _ Needless to say, at their very first meeting, she “with good intentions” told “the whole truth” about me.

I understand that the whole point of these events is only one thing, so that I never get away from it. test-antibiotic.com Mom really has no one but me. But I'm not a lap dog! In any case, I wouldn’t have left her, but just like that... my life was lost. I don't want anything. Sometimes I just stupidly sit for hours in my dark room or in the bathroom, just so as not to hear reproaches for longer. And not see her.