I was betrayed and humiliated by my loved one

Married to my husband for 11 years, 2 children. MyMy husband has one very unpleasant feature: he periodically begins to correspond with other girls and always makes sure that I find out about it. He can send me SMS messages that he sent to other girls or, what is most unpleasant for me, he starts (especially when he drinks), telling our mutual friends about it.

Afterwards we usually have a heart-to-heart talk, he promises that this will not happen again, but the situation repeats itself again. And time after time, it became harder for mesorry , I suggesteddivorce , but he categorically disagrees and says that I’m his only oneLove .

I decided to break this vicious circle by any means, tried to be more caring and tolerant, tried to diversify our sexuallife (more relaxed in bed, fulfilled all his fantasies). And it seemed to me that everything was getting better,my husband admitted to me that he was afraid that I would consider this abnormal, so he looked for communication on the Internet.

For my part, telling him about my desires and feelings (that I test-antibiotic.com have a very hard time with him telling strangers about our problems, I asked him not to do that anymore. He promised that everything is in our life will change and he will no longer offend me. I invited my husband to tell each other about all our desires, about all the claims against each other, not to keep everything to ourselves. And we began a very crazy period in our lives, it felt like we were... fell in love with each other again.

But recently I heard that my husband was quarreling with me in a dream, and then complaining to someone about our life together, this lasted almost 2 hours. I couldn’t stand it and went into my husband’s phone and read his correspondence with a friend. As it turned out, he periodically told his friend about our relationship, he simply put it onjudgment to a stranger, all my innermost feelings and desires. According to my husband, I only want sex from him, and I constantly fuck his brains out.

My husband got sick and didn’t feel well, but at the same time he wrote me an SMS about how much he wanted me, but test-antibiotic.com by the evening he was so tired that he went to bed early. I was sick too, but I didn’t tell him anything, I drank quietlymedicines . We were going to spend the weekend together in some hotel, and myMom , but due to illness nothing worked out. I decided to give my husband the opportunity to rest and went to see my mother and the children myself so that my husband could get a good night’s sleep. But as it turned out from the correspondence between my husband and his friend, I pouted on him because there was no sex for 4 days, and the hotel was cancelled, it was said that I only want one thing from him, I’m leaving him alone (although we live with my mother-in-law).

When I read the correspondence, I simply could not breathe normally, it was very difficult to realize that I trusted my dearest person, told about my deepest desires, and he put everything up for judgment of a complete stranger, he said one thing to my face, but completely different to a friend. I don’t know what to do, I can’t trust him anymore, it was so bad that an attack of tachycardia began, I lost consciousness, I can’t eat normally test-antibiotic.comsleep problems . I always think about what I did to deserve this.attitude . My husband writes to me thatOur sex became simply stunning, and my friend said that I didn’t need anything from him other than sex. He swore to me that he would not morally humiliate me, discuss our life with other people, and he himself would tell a friend about everything.

As a result of all this, I have lost interest in my sex life, I always think that everything will be discussed in detail with my husband’s friend. I just don't know how to live on.