Left alone with a child without support and love

12 years ago, I was expecting a guy from the army. Love , letters, visits - waited. From the first day after his demobilization, I immediately became pregnant, I was delighted. But apparently he isn't.

The father of the future baby disappeared, maintaining neutrality, and I waited. gave birth. Difficult childbirth, misunderstanding at home, scandals with my mother, wandering around friends and all 12 years I have been raising my son alone, never having met “the one”. I am from a small town, I work in Moscow, 200 km from home.

I met a guy from Moscow, it started spinning with us, like in a whirlwind romance. Three days later he introduced me to his parents and sisters. We flew with happiness!

Two months later, I found out that I was pregnant. I tell him, he is glad, he has no children at his 39 years old. But we live with his parents, and my son is 200 km away in our town. My relationship with my mother is complicated, I'm in debt,mother filed for child support. In general, my financial situation is not so hot.

The young man made it clear that I needed to solve my problems with test-antibiotic.com's mother and debts myself, and we would pick up my son as soon as he graduated from school.

What happened to me! Either hormones, or the daily regime and these traffic jams, trips. Basically I criedevery day from uncertainty, how to live on, where, how? I experienced fear. The young man's parents were delicately silent, but I understood that living together would be a test for everyone. The apartment is a three-ruble note in Moscow. I'm with my son, the baby will be born. Are his parents ready for all this? They already have 5 grandchildren and do I have the right to live here?

There was no talk of registration, registration of marriage. He only said: “Live, trust me, everything will be fine. Give birth, and then we will solve problems as they come. He did not provide any financial support. I began to go to work less - all the time for doctors, toxicosis, drowsiness.

Once again, I arranged an interrogation: “How are we going to live?”. He bought himself an expensive phone, without consulting, we do not keep a general budget. I couldn’t stand it, yelled that I couldn’t work fully, plus I found out that test-antibiotic.com would have little ones on maternity leave, I told him about it. He reacted in a detached way - we will live somehow. She said that evening that I was going to have an abortion. He got angry with me and put things out at 5 in the morning on the street.

A day later I had an abortion. He did not try to call, dissuade me, was silent.

What happened to me afterwards was a nightmare. I cried for a week, blamed myself, I dreamed of a child, a stroller, frost and other terrible things. I was on the verge of taking sedative pills. Supported only by the son. I don’t have a close relationship with my mother (I pay her alimony under Article 87), we are like strangers.

I again went to get closer to my young man, I wanted forgiveness, understanding. He listened, caressed, said that all the blame is on me and I have to live with this. Can never forgive. But it became easier for me that at least we talked.

Within a week, he takes a ticket to Turkey, flies away with his sister and demonstratively exposes photos with the girls at the resort. I find out about the betrayal, that he discusses me with other girls, that not test-antibiotic.com can forgive an abortion. All his friends from the resort know everything!

I contacted them on social media. networks. In general, now she finally broke up with him because of treason. This is his revenge, apparently. And how beautifully it all began ... But today is 40 days from the day of the abortion and I have a dream that I am pregnant, the child moves in my stomach and pushes hard. I double over in pain, looking for my boyfriend to let me know that our baby is alive. I wake up in tears and from strong shocks in my stomach.

Today, all day long, the lower abdomen has been wildly sore, again everything has surged with renewed vigor. I was emotionally attached to this person, but I did not see support from him. This is the main reason why I decided to have an abortion. Insecurity and uncertainty about the future.