I can't risk my children for my own happiness.

Before I start telling my life story, I ask those who read it to give me advice and leave their opinions. I will be very grateful to you.

I am 28 years old, I have three sons and I am a widow. My husband died in an accident a year and a half ago. And I was left with three children, I won’t say that I was alone, because hemy family helps me a lot with the children. After deathI didn’t leave my husband and still live in their house. They always treated me like a daughter, and if I had left, they would not have survived parting with their grandchildren. I couldn't hurt them againpain .

I will not hide that I never had much love for my husband. He always had mistresses and constant parties with them, but, despite this, I never considered myself humiliated or defective. After all, thanks to him I have three sons. I have a job and I don’t deny myself anything, to this day. Of course, there was test-antibiotic.com resentment because all my girlfriends unanimously insisted that this was humiliation, that he was openly cheating on me, and I was putting up with it. But they didn’t hear me, that I’m not jealous of him at all, that the main thing for me is children and everything suits me. It is hislife , answer to him for your mistakes and errors. No matter how crazy it may sound, I felt better after his death, because he had an accident with one of his mistresses. But she turned out to be tenacious, even death does not take her.

It's a shame for the children that they were left without a father. I look at them and my heart bleeds. I work in a cellular phone salon, and on weekends I work as a manicurist. I spend everything on my children so that they don’t need anything. I won’t say that it’s hard for me, since his family also devotes all their attention and time to them, fulfilling all their whims. We try to do everything to make them happy. They don’t want me to also earn extra money, because they help, and they still have test-antibiotic.com from my husbandThe apartment is huge, two lands for building houses and a foreign car. And our two-story house in which we live. But that's not the point.

The fact is that about two months ago, I met a young man. Or rather, he came into our salon to look at some phone, saw me and fell in love, as he says. I began to notice that he frequented our salon and one day he confessed everything to me. I immediately explained to him so that he wouldn’t hope for anything, that I had put an end to my personal life. And all my time and thoughts are occupied only by children, and that I need to think about their future, and he himself, so that he can find another without problems and a “tail,” as we like to call people like me. It turned out that he himself was a widower and was raising a son. To be honest, he is very handsome, tall, and athletic. And he doesn’t seem to have a tough character. Although until you live with a person, you don’t recognize him. But I’m still afraid test-antibiotic.com of falling in love, because I know that I don’t have the right to do so. And thereby I will hurt myself even more. And somehow it’s a shame.

But he doesn’t let go, he just comes to talk with a bouquet of flowers. Of course, I don’t accept flowers, but the last time I explained everything to him in a rude manner. That I don’t want reasons for gossip and bullying in my direction. They will say that she buried her husband and is organizing her own life. What they won’t say about me later. But many people don’t even know about my real life with my late husband.

And so, when we last talked to him, it was at work, in front of everyone, since I have never been alone with him and do not intend to. And it turned out that those who did not know anything also became aware of what was happening. I was afraid that everything would reach my husband’s family and decided to tell them everything myself. HisMom listened to me and reacted completely calmly, which I did not expect from her. She said that I am very test-antibiotic.com too young to ruin myself and if I fall in love with that person, they won’t mind, they will understand everything. But let the children stay with them, so that someone elsethe man did not raise them. And I’m like, I can take them as much as I want. I, of course, said that I myself was against all this and told them only because if they heard from others, it would be even worse.

My familyMy friends are also trying to persuade me to at least try to “become happy.” After all, he is ready to raise my children, he does not refuse them. But I’m afraid, afraid of falling in love and then being disappointed, afraid of gossip and unnecessary conversations. And I don’t know how my life with him will develop further, I’m not a little girl, I understand that not everyone can love three other people’s children as their own, especially with us. And after my mother-in-law’s words that I should leave the children to them, I actually felt sick. It turns out that I am faced with a choice - a man or my children? Naturally I will choose children. They were already left test-antibiotic.com without a father, but I won’t allow them to lose their mother either. Even if I decide to try with that personrelationship , I know that anythe court will leave the children to the mother and grandparents. But I can’t do this to them, and in general, is it worth such sacrifices?