I just can't find my happiness

I dated a guy for three years, and then he left for my best friend. After some time they got married. So I lost two people close to me at once. I was nineteen years old then.

A little time passed, and I met the guy again. But a year later we broke up. He was constantly looking for work and never stayed anywhere for long. Sometimes, instead of meeting with me, he chose the company of his friends and went for a drinkbeer .

I endured, helped him look for a job, even gave himmoney , because he always didn’t have it. We began to quarrel often, and I realized that this would happen all the time. And I decided to break up with him.

Now I'm thirty-five years old, I have my ownapartment , work. All this time I was alone, but recently I met a man ten years older than me. I always wanted to live outside the city and I thought that we would sell our apartments and buy or build a house. But he moved to live with me, since he left his apartment to his ex-wife and children.

I didn’t object so as not to offend him, but I don’t really like the fact that he spends almost his entire salary on children. I understand that children are learning and need help, but don’t give everything away. My money is enough, but it’s unpleasant for me that he lives on everything ready, and even on my money.

But when I told him thatpregnant , he got angry and started shouting that he already had children and didn’t need any more. He has this, but what about me? He said that the children grew up in that family, and he wanted to live for himself. And he's not going to start all over again and mess around with a small child.

When he told me to choose either him orchild , I, of course, chose the child. And he left, probably to look for another one like me. I no longer hope to find minehappiness , but I don’t regret anything. Now I am not alone, I will have the most important thing - a child, to whom I will give all my unspentLove .