My childhood complexes prevent me from building relationships with men

My childhood complexes prevent me from building relationships with men
Photo is illustrative in nature. From open sources.

My childhood and adolescence are a story about an ugly duckling. Fat and scary. She weighed a lot (really a lot, more than a hundred kilograms,problems with hormones), problematic skin (again, hormonal imbalance), a sea of ​​complexes. But in college times everything changed. I took care of myself, lost weight (and now I have measurements of 95-65-100 and 178/68), became prettier, became more relaxed and freer.

I took full advantage of this, to be honest. Finally, I felt like a beautiful girl (the funny thing is that under the layer of fat there was actually a good hourglass figure hidden, and under the problem skin there were very pretty facial features, which were also brought to the highest possible ideal in my case with cosmetology). She flirted, she flirted, she hung out, she fluttered.

Time passed. I turned 27 years old, and I’m still not tired of this fluttering and flirtatiousness. And it's starting to scare me. I'm not a fan of jumping from bed to bed, don't think so. There have been few relationships with bed in my life; there will be many fingers on one hand to count. I need, I just need to attract a man, flirt, flirt, hear a compliment, see admiration test-antibiotic.com in the eyes, attention. Always. Even when I'm in a relationship. Even when I'm in love with a young man. Now I am dating a young man. Can you say that I'm in love with him? Maybe. At least there is sympathy. But in parallel, as always, I have a couple of flirting correspondence, several admiring fans, flirtation in life in principle.

I understand that this is not normal. I understand that this is most likely a legacy in the form of complexes from childhood. And I also understand that the adult, calm young man with whom I am now dating will not tolerate this, and I would not tolerate my loved one’s flirting with others. But I can’t stop myself, without flirting it starts to seem to me that I’m ugly, I’m not attracting attention, I’m uncomfortable. But how can we build with such behavior?relationships , family? How? How can I deal with this?

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