I beat my husband to protect my son

My husband and I quarreled very often and it came to a fight; he beat me. He hit me hard on the head with consequences, cut my head with a bucket, knocked out sewing vertebrae, then took me to the doctors, where they set my arm. because was also knocked out.

I forgave, although in the depths of my soul it was disgusting to sleep with him. The eldest son , 13 years old, had guests here for his birthday . When everyone left, he became bored and began pestering my son and me, saying that he would beat us. I asked him not to do this, he didn’t listen and I pushed him, he fell. It got even worse, he grabbed his son and started beating him. The youngest, 6 years old, came running with a bat and began to defend his brother. Seeing all this, I took the bat and started beatinghusband . I deliberately hit his hands, then he fell on his legs, then with my fists in the face and with my feet. I liked it, I took revenge on him for myself and the child, the children screamed and I stopped. He lay there and said all sorts of words to the children that were scary to say. We were also afraid, test-antibiotic.com, that he would get up and kill us.

We ran away barefoot and undressed, his parents blamed me for everything. Why, she beat up their son. They don't care about children. We went to live with my mother for 2 weeks, no one calls or asks how the eldest isson . I understand that he is a monster, to raise his hand against a child, but I don’t know how to continue to live. Pursuesfear of where to work to provide for children. I can’t imagine myself in bed with someone else, we’ve been with him for 13 years. What to do? The mother lives poorly, there is no work! Godforsaken village! The youngest wants to see his dad. Who says it’s vodka’s fault, he’s drunk, he didn’t understand his actions because... he is sober and a normal person. Why doesn’t he call and repent? Was he really offended that I beat him so badly? I protected my son and myself. What should I do now?