I haven't achieved anything in life and I feel like a failure.

I had enough. I’m almost thirty years old, but I haven’t really achieved anything, I live in the house where I was born (I haven’t loved it since childhood, there are a lot of negative associations, I can’t sell it yet, people from my family are showing off because they’re used to it).

I can’t find a decent and permanent job to move somewhere else. I’m afraid of difficulties, because I’m used to sitting still, I feel stressed, if something suddenly needs to be done, it unsettles me.

Already at the age of 17, I realized this problem, but I did not think that by almost thirty everything would be the same. I feel uncomfortable with strangers, I always feel like someone might cheat on me. I am a weak person, both morally and physically, and even if I am aware of deception, I can still follow the lead out of fear.

I know that with such qualities I will not achieve anything. If someone insults me, I may not respond immediately due to stress. In my youth, I almost didn’t go out late at night, since my parents were always worried about me (and were sad if I talked about my problems). I still don’t go to test-antibiotic.com, because they will definitely hook me. As I grew older, my coordination began to deteriorate and my balance began to deteriorate. I’ve never slept with a girl, I want to go to a paid one, but I’m afraid I’ll pick up something or run into a blackmailer.

One day I still wanted to change, I began to show character, I tried to swing, put my room in order and be less nervous, I even began to communicate with a quite attractive girl. But self-development suddenly began to cause stress and failures: having done it oncea remark to a passerby who pushed me, I almost got hit in the face, from then on I became downtrodden again, I also got into a fight with a girl over nonsense, I lost confidence and charisma, little things began to piss me off. In general, I sank to the very bottom. I don't know what to do next.