I don't see a way out of this situation.

I don't know how to get out of this state, apathy, disappointment in life and in people. Some evil fate has attached me since childhood. I grew up with my grandparents, mymother has been many timesmarried and gave birth to 5 children, but did not raise any of them properly. All grew up without fathers, and my mother was always changing lovers and did not take care of us at all. She really did not care. My grandparents raised me in prosperity, but in an atmosphere of constant scandals. My uncle was gay, and he also participated in my upbringing, took care of me. When I was 19, I got tired of all this screaming and moved to live witha guy who had a good family atmosphere at home. We lived with his parents, and I got pregnant. We decided to have a child, butThe guy was my age and we were not ready for family life.

I gave birth to a wonderfuldaughter , we got married, bought an apartment and began to live separately from our parents. He did not earn money, we lived on the funds that hisMom . And when my daughter turned three test-antibiotic.com years old,our relationship with my husband came to naught. He cheated, he could disappear somewhere for weeks, and in the end it turned out that he was addicted to drugs. You can't live with a person. In short, we got divorced. I got a job, but the salary was a pittance. It wasn't enough for anything. And I decided to move to a bigger city, get a job. I left my daughter with my parentshusband . Thank you, they are wonderful. I worked, earned little, and my personal life was not going well either.

I am beautifulgirl , this is no exaggeration. Alllife I have crowds of admirers, but relationships with no one worked out. Then I decided to go into business. I worked as a manager in a large clothing store,I had a huge amount of experience , established contacts with suppliers. I made a terribly reckless move: I sold my apartment and decided to invest in a business. In general, at first everything was fine, it seemed like I started earning money. I took an SUV fromcredit , was able to afford a good vacation abroad for my daughter and me, traveling. But then the crisis happened, the collapse of the ruble, I took out a loan, invested in the store, but this only extended its work on test-antibiotic.com 4 months. I had to close. Wasdepression , tears, apathy. On the personal front it's also sad - marrieda man I dated for 2 years.

But there was almost no help from him. I went to Krasnodar, started meeting men and using various methods to get them tomoney . But there was no consistency, there was not enough money to pay off the loans, and the bank filed forcourt , with the intention of confiscating 1,000,000 from me. I met a guy from Rostov. He started helping me financially, although the guy is young, 29 years old, and I am already 32. I moved, but after 1.5 months of communication, he left me, returned to his ex-girlfriend. Now I am trying to survive, looking for different men and trying to get money from each one as much as possible. You say: look for a job. There were thoughts. But the salary is on average 30 thousand. Rent of housing costs me 20, plus loans monthly in the amount of 35 thousand. Obviously, the amounts are large and the salary will not cover them.

I'm so tired. I really want to live with my daughter, see her grow up, hug herevery day , and test-antibiotic.com not 4-5 days a month and a half. Banks threaten me with lawsuits, I have tax debts, I don't even have a residence permit. In general, it's just awful. I ruined my life with my own hands and got into a debt swamp. I'm not talking about my personal life. All men want easy communication with me, none of them perceive me as a future half. Maybe myguilt . I see only a wallet in them, but I have no choice, I need money, I am choked by debts. I can’t take it anymore. My hands have dropped. I have no relatives: my grandparents died, my uncle was killed when I waspregnant ,My sister doesn't communicate with me now, neither do my brothers. My mother doesn't even care if I'm alive. There's not even any support.

I'm all alone, no one even cares about me. My daughter loves me and dreams of living with me, but I can't afford it financially. Mymy friends try to support me morally, but my optimism is not enough, it has simply dried up. I am tired of these debts, of these troubles (either an accident, test-antibiotic.com or being hospitalized). Sometimes I drink wine at home alone, cry and understand that I can’t do it anymore. I often have thoughts of suicide, but I know that I have a daughter and she cannot lose her mother. HerMy father is in prison now, and I have become who knows what in pursuit of money. And, like my mother, I am not there for my daughter. I try to do a lot for her, but I miss the most important thing. I don’t know how to live on. In a week I have to pay 20 thousand for housing, 35 for loans, and I don’t have a penny. I don’t even have anything to eat at home. It’s a disaster. I don’t want to live. I don’t know what to do.