I can no longer live with such a husband

Every day I regret that I leftmarried _ I am 22 years old, my husband is 25. We have been living together for two years, married for 4 months, no children.

Umy husband has a two-room apartmentapartment , so at the very beginning of the relationship we started living together. Yes, I fell head over heels in love, as I now understand, and turned a blind eye to absolutely all his shortcomings. Starting on Friday, he went out with friends, clubs, bars, saunas.

Like a faithful dog, I waited for him at home, didn’t sleep at night, sat by the window with a mug of tea. I called, searched, walked around the yards, called all my friends. He usually came in the morning at about 5-6 o'clock, drunk, angry, often (almost always) calling me names and humiliating me. I fed him, put him to bed, and then went to work.

This is how most of our weekends went. He skipped a lot of money, paid off his loans, which he accumulated to pay compensation to the victim whom he beat. Therefore, most often I bought food, cooked, and did everything around the house. I’m ashamed to admit, but I often bought him clothes, and in general many of the costs were borne by me. Then we started repairing test-antibiotic.com, again, I invested most of the money, with the condition that he would return it to me (and to this day this debt hangs on him, and it is not very noticeable that he is trying toreturn ).

I loved blindly and simply to the point of madness, I lived and breathed it, now remembering that time, I think, were the feelings really mutual? He constantly deceived me, walked around, drank, raised his hand, I forgave everything, believed that he would change. In two years with him I went through so many troubles, so much humiliation. But no, I didn’t leave, I believed in the best, that he would change, that ourlife will change. For two years, he didn’t buy me anything, didn’t give me anything, but how many tens of thousands I spent on him and our lives.

A year into our relationship, we started talking about marriage and finally decided to get married. My mother and I paid for the wedding entirely. His mother-in-law gave him a certain amount of money, but he spent it left and right and didn’t invest a penny into the wedding. Two months before the wedding, when the date had already been set, test-antibiotic.com when almost everything was ready and paid for, I began to notice changes in him. He started going for walks openly; if before he had somehow asked for time off, then he would simply leave without my knowledge and turn off his phone. At that time, I often lived with my mother, and when I came home, I could observe the following picture: the food was untouched, the bed was untouched, and even a fool would understand that he did not spend the night at home. I began to suspect that someone had appeared with him. He cooled off towards me, began to behave very arrogantly, and didn’t care about me at all.

A week after the wedding, I found out about another one. I remember he came home drunk from his friends and fell asleep. At that moment, I already felt and understood that he had someone, but I couldn’t catch him. I was lying on the bed, looking at the ceiling, I remember how my heart was beating wildly, because I knew that if I took his phone, I would definitely find something there. And I was not mistaken. That evening he came not from friends, but from her. I test-antibiotic.com re-read their correspondence a million times, but I didn’t shed a single tear, I squeezed it out of myself, tried to cry, but I couldn’t. I didn't sleep a wink all night. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t sleep.

Of course, there was a scandal, I talked to him, to her. He crawled on his knees, beggedforgive me , he said that they only communicated and he did not sleep with her. And I forgave, but on the condition that no friends andalcohol _ And four months have passed since that moment. Indeed, he does not go out and drinks only with my permission and only at home. But! He has changed altogether, he has become angry, he perceives me only as a servant,doesn’t bring money into the house at all, when I start reproaching him, he goes into a rage “if I don’t have money, where will I get it from, you have it and buy it.” No affection, no love, no sex. I am his money bag and servant.

There were several times during these months when he got drunk, how much anger and hatred flew at me. It was as if test-antibiotic.com began to deliberately take me out, to mock me morally. I go home reluctantly and stay at work until the last minute. And when I arrive, I immediately turn on the music in my headphones and start drawing so as not to see or hear him. For the last few weeks I’ve just been thinking about how I can get away from him. I know that he won’t give me a peaceful life, and if he drinks, he might actually use force. So I live first of all, blaming myself,every day I think: “why, why did I marry him, I’m the only one to blame for this.”