I'm afraid for my son because of my daughter-in-law's behavior

I’ve been reading life stories on this site for a long time, I noticed that very thoughtful, sympathetic people gathered here.

I havehusband andson . My son got married a few years ago. Have a baby. I absolutely do not interfere with their family. Friendly with her daughter-in-law. Grandma "on call". I try to take care of themmarriage and respect my son’s choice. That's why I'm writing here. The future is still thenmy daughter -in-law lived with us for a year before marriage. She showed herself to be very decent and serious. Of course, they had quarrels, but my husband and I never interfered. They didn’t even get into it unless they asked. Both son and daughter-in-law are both not just hard workers, but workaholics. At the time they met, the son became the director of a large enterprise. The daughter-in-law is the owner of a small chain of stores. They worked from morning to night. I’ll immediately emphasize that when our son fell ill with something, especially with a fever, he got used to lying down, sleeping, and recovering. The daughter-in-law, even when she caught a serious flu with a high fever, endured the illness “on her feet” and continued to go to work and do something around the house. While test-antibiotic.com they lived with us, my husband and I told her to lie down, she: “I can’t do this, I have to not get limp!”

About six months have passed. The son did not propose to her. My husband and I did not rush him and did not ask questions. You have to “ripen” yourself. Once, my future daughter-in-law and I were left alone in the apartment, and she said to me: “why doesn’t he propose to me?” I said: “This is his personal business, you discuss it with him yourself.” And then she suddenly simply exploded: “What does he think of himself! I’ve been living with him for six months, and he…” and called her son a stream of obscene words. I was just speechless. I pulled myself together and calmly told her never to utter such words about my son in my presence again. A day later she apologized. I didn’t tell my husband about this (with his temperament, he would have kicked her out the door), nor my son, let them sort it out themselves, otherwise my words would look like a slander that I was trying to quarrel between them. It was only here, on this site test-antibiotic.com, that I said this for the first time.

Soon the son himself proposed. We bought an apartment. They moved there. The wedding has passed. The daughter-in-law’s side is also friendly, “non-interfering” parents. Everything seems to be fine. Six months pass, but nothing comespregnancy , and my daughter-in-law said that she wanted it soonergive birth (age is in a hurry). She decided to go on vacation with her friends at the seaside, while her son stayed at home for work. He took it for granted and said: “I’m busy from morning until late at night, everything is going well in her stores, let it go away.”

She returned two weeks later. A month later they announce to their relatives that shepregnant _ She didn’t feel well throughout her pregnancy, but she went to work looking green. I started to behave very capriciously and get angry in front of my relatives, but I don’t know what it was like with them alone. I only know that once she went to a hotel and lived there for three days, and my son asked me if pregnant women always behave inappropriately. I calmed him down and talked about hormones. Gave birth. During discharge she behaved viciously. She threw the flowers that her son test-antibiotic.com had brought into the trash bin. I didn’t talk to my relatives (even my own). In the evening, my son calls and says: “She is always unhappy with me, no matter what I do. At the level of “you sit wrong, you stand wrong.” My husband and I decided - maybe postpartumSome kind of depression ? They continued their friendly behavior. After a while, the son said that she, it turns out, was angry, that everyone rushed to look at the child, and not to congratulate her, but she was suffering, giving birth. Well, I guess we'll wait and see. And she kept trying to persuade her son to be patient, saying: “Look, it’s hard for her, she can’t sleep, she’s feeding, she has colic, teeth.” All the time she unobtrusively suggestedhelp (her parents are far away in Siberia, they only came for discharge). She refused, saying: “We do it ourselves, I actually have a husband!”

Two months later, she herself asked me to stay with the child, because she had to go to work. I decided to be happy with what I have andI set my husband up like that. Need to say. That she is an ideal housewife. Everything is clean, shiny, the food is always prepared, the child is dressed like from the glossy pictures, everything is on schedule. She left me a piece of paper with an exact schedule of what to do and when, test-antibiotic.com, but she always greeted me with some kind of anger. I tried to talk several times. Doesn't make contact. Through clenched teeth: “Yes, everything is fine!” Leaves. He comes, thanks and silently waits for me to get ready and leave. I decided that I would enjoy communicating with my grandson and would not pester him with conversations. New Year . Relatives gathered. The son, daughter-in-law and grandson came. She is angry, he is confused. We say toasts. She said: “Yes, everything is not as I imagined, but Happy New Year!” Everyone kept a delicate silence. Then she once said to me while I was sitting with my grandson: “Yes, I’m unlucky with your son. Egoist. He only thinks about work."

They went on holiday to the sea several times, both of us (my grandson and I) and three of us. On weekends he is with us, and they go somewhere else. During general holidays, she is chronically indignant, even shouted at her son several times in front of everyone, he is chronically confused, not knowing how to behave when people shout at you in front of guests. I repeat, my son held a serious position, a respected man. I once asked him test-antibiotic.com: “When you and your colleagues are sitting in a cafe, does she behave the same way?” He took her to meetings more than once. He said: “unfortunately yes.” But if I’m indignant, then she either doesn’t talk to me for several days until I come up first, or she threatens to go to her parents in Siberia and take the child away.”

And after several years of their marriage, the son first stopped going on business trips abroad (he used to often travel for work, and began sending deputies to resolve issues). She was angry that he not only worked there, but also saw other countries, but she did not (she fed the baby until she was one and a half years old, how could he take her with him?). I say that he should stop feeding for so long if the climate in the family is under threat. No, she said that the child must have good immunity. So my son left the position of director (he doesn’t notice this, but I think if at home they shout and blame all the time, is it possible to calmly command other people?). He says: “Mom, I’m just tired, I don’t have the strength to test-antibiotic.com.” And recently I found out that my son was sick with the flu and had a high fever. I tell them to bring the child to us so as not to infect him, but the son says: “she said that since I’m not at work, but at home, I should do household chores.” I say: “Your temperature is 40!” It turned out that the daughter-in-law said: “I do everything when I’m sick, so nothing will happen to you.” She keeps the child in another room and quartzizes all the rooms in the apartment. She left for work, her son is lying sick in the bedroom. I say that I’ll go out, at least take a walk with my grandson. The daughter-in-law says: “You can’t, otherwise your son will fall asleep right away. No need to sleep. We have to do things." I stayed with my grandson. The son fell asleep. Two hours passed. I write her an SMS and ask if the child needs to be given medicine (they give him medicine on a schedule). She is not responding. Five minutes later, the sick son comes out of the bedroom: “my wife said to give the child some medicine, she just sent me an SMS.” That is, she answered not to me, but to him! So as not to sleep!

My heart is just not in the right place. You will probably tell test-antibiotic.com that your son is henpecked. But she blackmails him all the time by taking the child away. I tried to be a patient mother-in-law, but now I think that maybe I, like my son, am already putting up with all her antics? Where is the line where non-interference in the son’s family ends and “flow around” begins? Or is this normal for my son? And soIs family more important than career and self-respect? Please advise.