Confessions of a good stepmother

My husband and I have been married for 7 years. We met after his divorce from his first wife.

All these years, I've been trying to get along with his incoming daughter from his first marriage. She was 4 years old when we met her. The child is difficult, and this is not my "prejudiced" opinion. The genetics of a mother who does not get out of psychologists, who blames everyone around her for her failures and at the same time parasitizes on the people around her. In addition, the child is terribly spoiled and permissive. It was like that before the divorce, and after that, everything only got worse.

Now the child is 11 years old, and it's just a nightmare. Her mother does not care for her at all, she always has her ownproblems , as she herself says. My hands drop. I myself already have two children with my husband, who see all this. From the first day I surrounded her with love and care, tried my best to educate her and teach her good things, we took her on all trips with my husband, despite the fact that we dreamed of romance, but this feeling of guilt in front of the child did not give him a test- antibiotic.com rest.

All these years, I bathed her, fed her, walked with her and just talked. We took her 3 days a week, always. And all the holidays she also lived with us. How many weekends of my life have I sacrificed for her and peace with my husband in the family. But she never fully accepted me. She talked, rejoiced, smiled, but never in her life called me by name, never hugged me, nor congratulated me on a single birthday, although I always congratulated her myself. And constantly spoiled everything, not on purpose, of course. Samechild .

But I endured everything. Each time, she enjoyed our pastime, and then behind my back told me that she didn’t like everything. On all trips to this day, she exhausts the whole family with her whining about how she doesn’t like everything. Even my small children do not whine so much! This year, she began to secretly complain to dad that I and my children were disturbing her. And this after all the years of my caring and all my test-antibiotic.com sacrifices for them and dad? My husband did not even stand up for me, which also hurt me.

Everyone around me assured me from the first day, including my husband, that if I accept her and be a “good stepmother”, the child will imbue me, reach out, and someday, I will wait for at least a kind word from her. And I firmly believed in it. No, I cared for her not for the sake of some return, but because I thought it was right. Which is what is needed. But now, I seriously doubt it. Who needs it? Who is right?

The last straw was that now she once again got into trouble at school. We had a family council with my husband and her mother. We all together determined the measure of punishment, I supported them. But, in the end, after a couple of weeks, she went downhill again. And now, all of a sudden, she stopped talking to me. And she even stopped coming to dad if I'm at home. This is already beyond my understanding. I didn't do anything to her. It's not my fault that test-antibiotic.com she misbehaves, deceives her parents and she has to be punished. But for some reason, she chose me as the scapegoat.

I asked my husband to understand the situation, why the child stopped communicating with me, but refused. He himself was tired of her antics and replied that if it worries me, then deal with her yourself. And I just don't have the strength anymore. At the same time, he recently tried to make a remark to me that she came to visit, but left immediately after I returned home. I again say that I do not know what my fault is, and that if it bothers him, let him talk to her himself. In response, ignore!

I'm already confused and don't know what to do? At our family council, for the first time, I heard a phrase from her mother: “You are nobody at all in our situation, why are you climbing?”. And for the first time, I thought seriously.

Maybe, really, it would be right just not to climb all these years? She hasmom and dad. And here I am? Why am I even involved in raising and caring for her test-antibiotic.com? But, there is, however, one point, I do not know if this is true or not. Often when I try to ignore her, something happens. Some minor trouble. Either I get sick, then the children, then some important event breaks down. I am a believer, and it immediately seems to me that it is God who is punishing me for turning away from her! Although, my friends say that this is not so, and I really don’t owe her anything. And that I'm just exhausted, or it's psychosomatic.

Now, she hasn’t talked to me for a month, and I stopped talking to her myself, and again, by the way, I got sick.

I do not know what to do? How can I get along with her? Forgive again and “be friends” with her, and endure her insults behind her back and her eternal whining, how do we annoy her with the children? Or completely disengage from it, live your life, your family, and at the same time, do not blame yourself for it? For my part, I did everything in my power. Is it really right for test-antibiotic.com to beg her for a good attitude and indulgence all her life?

Help with advice, please.