How not to lose touch with adult children?

I have a story of communication with my son that is similar to yours and I decided to share it too. My adult, marriedmy son also began to move away from me and the situation is very similar to the one described above. He received a higher education, works, and so on according to the list, everything is fine. But the first one never calls. Maybe not call for a month until my husband and I start looking. Sometimes he doesn’t pick up the phone when we call, and he doesn’t call back.

Once my son also complained to me that I raised him poorly, did not treat him right, and he received psychological trauma (in middle school) and because of this it is now difficult for him to communicate with me. But we communicated with him both in high school and while studying at the university, psychotrauma did not interfere.

This is how a woman also receives psychological trauma - she was living her life, and then, in terrible agony, a little man appeared, about whom she needs to take care and worry every minute! And wherein,the mother did not send her son to an orphanage, raised him, gave him an education, helped with housing and grandchildren. And test-antibiotic.com son, isn’t he glad that he got a lucky ticket in fate, to live on Earth, to see and experience this world, to be human?

That is, our adult sons want to break away from their roots andforget their parental family, mother and what they had before meeting their wife. I agree that such men are very suggestible. And they easily fall under the influence of others. First they were under the influence of their parents, mother, now under the influence of their wife. ANDWhat is the mother's fault in this? This is a person’s temperament, he needs to obey someone. And we are parents exactly as old as our children. Yes, parents really count onhelp and support for sons in old age. And that's okay. But! Nowadays there are a lot of videos on the Internet about how you need to tear yourrelationships with parents because they negatively affectlife of the young. And psychoanalysis according to Freud is offered. And Freudianism, by the way, is recognized as a dead-end branch in the development of psychology. And a bunch of other psychological theories are being promoted on the Internet, which are all recognized as pseudoscience. But the videos are so convincing that many, test-antibiotic.com, apparently believe them. So our sons reach a dead end in their relationship with their mother.

Very often a son moves away from his mother because his relationship with his wife deteriorates. And so as not to hear the offensive from my mother: “I told you so.” They decide that it is better not to communicate with their mother at all. They live in a family for the sake of their children. Unfortunately, apparently, these are weak people, weak men who cannot become significant in their young family. And, apparently, by breaking off relations with their mother, they feel their strength. Be afraid to call your adult mother, because you are afraid of becoming dependent on her advice and showing this weakness in front of your wife, who will probably reproach them for weakness.

Girls, let's take pity on our weak adult sons, let's mentally wish them happiness, prosperity and all the best. It would be worse if our sons were mother’s sons, and there are plenty of them too, they don’t get married, don’t work, drink, smoke. Still, the state will take care of us, we won’t die of hunger. Come on, let’s go live in a nursing home. Although, I repeat, no matter how hard it was for us in the 90s test-antibiotic.com, we did not send our sons to orphanages. And many can still provide for themselves.

It seems to me that this behavior of sons is like a chronic illness that may not be cured if the sons themselves do not want to and do not make an effort to do so. We lived under pressure, fearing for our lives andthe health of our children: “What if something bad happens to him! I will be to blame for this! I will never forgive myself!” Now our boys are already grown-up uncles, and we still take responsibility for their adult lives - cars, apartments, health, prosperity.

We are all human and at any moment something can happen to each of us. We are afraid of not being able to do something, of not giving enough to our children, what we didn’t give to our children, we want to do for our grandchildren. And it is right. But if your son is fighting against your society and cannot clearly formulate the reasons, most likely he is simply weak as a person, and we can’t change anything here. We must take it for granted that someone wears glasses, someone has blue eyes, test-antibiotic.com and someone has gray eyes.