How to decide to divorce an aggressive husband?

I already wrote mineconfession about aggressionhusband , I want to add one more thing. He had this behavior for a long time. But, unfortunately, I was as if I was blind.

The first time he behaved aggressively was when we celebrated our first New Year . There were three of us - minesister , me and him. He drank and after a while began to act irritable. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but the gist was that he was worried about howa man that he has nothing, and he is a student, that he cannot support us properly, he is afraid that sooner or later I will leave.

The following is such a situation. Our son turned one year old, all the relatives gathered, had a good time, everyone laughed. The guests left, we lived with my parents at that time, and he was led again, and for some reason his main enemy is always me. Anger at me, aggression at me, rushes at me with scary eyes. Then he was reassured by myfather , as a resultmy husband went drunk to see his mother at night, I was breastfeeding at that time, stayed with my parents with test-antibiotic.com as a child and worried for the rest of the evening. The next morning my husband came with an apology and said, I don’t remember what happened to me, as if some kind of demon had taken possession of me.

The third situation was in the summer at sea, on vacation, then with his parents. Also sharply, he began to aggressively attack me because he thought that I had put the car key somewhere, but he couldn’t find it, although he himself put it away somewhere, and this began his next exit. Then he pushed me for the first time and grabbed my arms several times. He said terrible things to me: “Who are you anyway, so that myMom followed you!” I then went away from him so as not to see him and not continue the conflict, and his mother went to me to find out what had happened. The next morning everything went according to plan - I’m sorry, I love you, I don’t know what came over me and again the ideal husband.

After was minebirthday , there I already heard the following words: “let’s cry some more, you’re our victim, poor thing, you need to feel sorry for her.” Screamed like test-antibiotic.com crazy. Then my father and his stepfather were also with us, they gathered and went to continue celebrating at their home with the words, let them figure it out themselves. Then my sister and her remainedwe have a guy . And my husband was performing all evening, and then he pressed me against the door so that I hit my head. After that we had a very longquarrel , but in the end, I forgave him again.

The next episode was on his birthday. I prepared all day, he was at work, I invited all his friends as a surprise, he didn’t know. I set the table, he came already drunk from his stepfather and mother, he was already celebrating, so to speak, while he waited for me to finish the last preparations. The result was a scandal, his drunken hysteria. I’m a victim, they say, give me more, insults, grabbing his hands, forced me to talk to him. Oh horror, now I’m writing this and my soul feels bad.

There was no point in writing about such situations, it was all the same. At the head of all his grievances are his personal fears andcomplexes , he is still on the way test-antibiotic.com to his realization, as a man he has not yet come into existence. Even though he already hasfamily and home in commonloan , and already have a car. But there are eternal conflicts inside. He says that he is afraid of losing me, that I will leave for someone else. And as soon as I say that I will leave him because of his antics, he begins to say that I have apparently found someone better. He used to look at my phone and check it, then I set boundaries and he stopped. He doesn’t want me to communicate with anyone other than my family, he says: “Isn’t communication with me enough for you?”

Now, after the last conflict, he behaves very carefully, in principle, as I already said,his relationship with me is good, and he doesn’t always behave so aggressively, it happens in episodes, maybe after six months, or a month, or after 3 months. I don't know how it works.

But now I feel a certain emptiness, it seems that I have become cold and even strict, before I was very soft and joyful. He says he loves me, but more often I want to remain silent. test-antibiotic.com Reading all this, you can say, get up and go away, no normal person will tolerate such behavior, I agree, but for some reason I can’t. It’s difficult for me, I know, and I feel how all this is destroying me, the child also feels all this. And he once witnessed such behavior from his father. He then called him bad for a long time.

No one will influence him; his parents know about his such antics. His mother says: “If you lose your family, it will be your own fault.” My parents always insist on reconciliation, saying: “after all, it’s a family, I feel sorry for you.” Everyone around is in favor of preserving the relationship. One sister tells me: “enough of all this, cut it, get a divorce.”

No one but me will solve this situation. How to get out of all this?