I wish I didn't know anything

I've been married for several years now. I love my husband , we have a happy life.relationships and everything is just fine. I will say honestly that I am very careful in relationships with men. It is not that I control every stephusband or spied on him. I just really value honesty in relationships. I don't like secrets, and I've never hidden anything from my husband. And naturally, I've always demanded the same from him.

Just recently, while cleaning the apartment, I found my husband's old diary. I understand that it is not good to read other people's diaries, but I could not help but read his. I really wanted to know what he once wrote, what he thought about, how he lived. And you know, I was not mistaken.

In it I found a list of my husband's ex-girlfriends. But it wasn't this fact itself that confused me, but the number of those same girls. The thing is, there were 17 of them. Just imagine! I had no idea that my husband had such a rich and varied personallife .

Honestly, after reading these notes, I couldn't calm down. Is it really myhusband so frivolous and loving? How could he have relationships with so many girls? And why did he never tell me about it? A bunch of different obsessive thoughts appeared in my head. They did not give me peace all day.

In the evening, when my husband came home from work, I decided to talk to him. Honestly, I thought that my husband would deny it and all that. But it was not so, my husband did not deny anything. He said that thesegirls have been in his life for a long time and don't matter to him now. Like, it was before me and I shouldn't worry about it.

He may be right, but his words don't make me feel any better. I'm constantly tormented by all sorts of doubts. After all, my husband has opened up to me from a new side. I just can'tforget about everything you read and learned.

There are a lot of different thoughts in my head. I started to worry about my relationship with my husband. I keep thinking that the connection with one of these girls might test-antibiotic.com resume again. What if he continues to date one of them? Maybe my husband has found himself another girl, since he is such a ladies' man? What ifMy husband is cheating on me and I don't even know about it?

I just don't know what to do. I've lost my peace and can't sleep peacefully. These obsessive thoughts don't give me peace. I don't know how to react to such a discovery. What should I do to save our relationship?

I'm about to get paranoid. Are there any tools or devices that can help me control my husband when he's not home? I wish I'd never found this diary.

Despite my husband's assurances that all this is in the past, I don't believe him. Now nothing will be the same as before.