Love or emotional dependence?

I am 22 years old. He's also 22. Let's finishuniversity this year.

The relationship with the guy lasted almost 4.5 years. Yesterday we broke up. He suggested it himself. Unexpected for me. This is my first seriousLove .

It was periodically (often) difficult for me in relationships. It was very difficult. It seemed like I didn't deserve this. Uncomfortable. It was good too. But I loved the man. I have enormous attachment, emotional dependence. Now everything has gone out.

And it seems clear that it’s hard for everyone in such a situation, but everyone experiences it differently. Everyone has their own temperament, level of stress resistance, endurance.

And it seemed like something was wrong with us, but I couldn’t take such a step to break up. I'm so used to it. And she began to adopt his manners and words. Now I feel like I'm a failure. I'm unlucky in love, butfriends are donegot married . Happy, probably.

I want someone to be nearby, to hug me, to feel sorry for me now, but I no longer have such a person. Have friends. But they have their own lives, and their ownProblems . And evenunderstanding my test-antibiotic.com problem.

It seems like there is no strength. In a year I will be sitting at a reception likedoctor . Responsible specialty. It seems I'm alone. Alone with yourself, with your thoughts. A lot of self-doubt, melancholy. Thoughts that I will never have the same person with whom we will have healthyrelationship ,family .

Where should I direct my energy if there is any left? Where should I go? And how to survive this period?