My love and illusion

I write my thoughts on paper often because someone said it helps. I wrote when I felt despair andpain . It was not a sudden surge of inspiration or a craving for art. I just thought it would help.

Sometimes I try to understand whether there was something other than illusion and manipulation. What did I want so badly that I couldn’t break the connection? Was it really that important to me? If all desires are given to us by God, then all questions go to the top!

Maybe that’s what I need, but I have to give it my due, I didn’t expect this! Smart and confidentthe girl paid attention to me at that moment when I didn’t even know how to get acquainted and startcommunication . I really liked it because it flattered me. She seemed very proud and saw only benefit in others. I didn’t even notice how I got involved in an interesting and exciting game with a happy ending. Is notdivorce _ It seemed. Since she has such a practical approach to people, maybe there is something in me? Is everything test-antibiotic.com for the better?

Somehow I got a phone. Problem. How to call? Immediately or later? While I was thinking and deciding, four days passed. I took a piece of paper and wrote down everything I wanted to say. I walked around the room with him for two hours. I even figured out how to get around the anxiety. I’ll ask first about one thing, then about another, then quickly and to the point. I'm still worried, but I need to do something. I am already 19 years old, many of my peersgirls already, but I still can’t meet them. Naturally she screwed me over. Where did I screw up? Perhaps she is just playing, but how can she explain this to her brain, which has already switched off. I can’t ask for more, otherwise I’ll completely lose respect. But it didn't last long for me.

Did I have a chance? I used to think for a long time about how to respond to this or that attack, but for every answer I had, there was a ready answer! What a smart girl! Now the question is: how to get back? Has anyone said anything about the rules of the game? I got caught up, how do I get out now? Within a month I had to reconsider my views on the world, and after 2 months I had to think about the limitless possibilities test-antibiotic.com of a person. This is when you need to swim underwater, but you've already run outoxygen _ It seems that you are already at the limit, but this passes over time. It’s good when you have no pity or guilt, nothing interferes. And if you are a shy and insecure person, then you are finished! And if emotions are also involved, then it’s just some kind of paralysis.

Well, I'm a man! We need to come up and say everything! What you can’t do like that and what I want. I came up, opened my mouth and stood there. There are no words, my breath is taken away. I've taken in air, but I can't exhale. He stood there like that for a few seconds. I thought I looked stupid - I was wrong! Nobody even noticed! She probably understood and felt a lot. Changed my imageevery day and never repeated. Well done! But still, obvious acting talent, where to go? As practice shows, if you behave well, then fate gives you a second chance, sometimes even a third, but if you are a desperate fighter for justice, then even a thousand is not enough. You begin to see the catch in everything.

What is test-antibiotic.com the problem of strong desire or sympathy? Probably because you start to think about it more often and become obsessed. You are easy to manipulate in this state. You just have to not think, that’s all. Is this possible? Understanding does not save you from consequences. When you experience so many emotions, you are in a state of stress 24 hours a day. Soon I became nervous and people began to advise me to go to church. Let's go. I reached the threshold, the priest sits and countsmoney , turned around and went back! Where is this soul master when you need him so much? I already understood that if it weren’t for this whole situation, and thisattitude towards me, then I would even marry such a passionate beauty. Someone described withdrawal symptoms to me, I even found a difference. Less intense, but longer lasting.

I decided that I could live like this. Many people have much largerproblems . Within the framework of the entire universe, I am not even visible. We have to wait. There is only one cure for love and a runny nose - it will go away on its own. I will not rant in front of someone who clearly ignores me. But over time, test-antibiotic.com it didn’t get any easier. I already realized that you can write and call, this is the only way to temporarily get rid of the pain. There is, of course, another option, if not for her obvious flirting with other guys. This was especially unpleasant. I don't know how to forgive. Just a couple of years later I realized that I would have to take action. I started dousing myself with cold water and jogging. It helped for an hour. And I decided to end this nonsense. He looked up and decided to overcome at the same timefear of heights. Climbed to the 12th floor. Well, once I got in, I took the elevator. Gorgeous view. The pain has disappeared somewhere. Adrenaline helped. Good way. Suddenly someone called out to me from behind. I backed away and went downstairs in horror. Just think, what a mess I made. What stupidity, my problems are pathetic and not worth the tears of people dear to me. I'm pathetic myself. It could always be worse. Don't make it worse!