My husband wants everything to be the same as before

Came outI got married at the age of 20, so I ran away from my tyrant son-in-law, living with my sister, then from my father’s unbearable character, living with him. AboutI won’t tell you about the mother of a tyrant and despot, with whom I lived until I was 13, there is nothing good there.

Then rejection from relativeshusband because it’s not comfortable. She doted on her husband, loved madly, did everything for him. When I was on maternity leave with my second child, there were financial difficulties, I denied myself everything. I didn’t have enough clothes, I didn’t have enough money. My husband felt that I was completely dependent on him financially, he began to behave with me as he wanted, to say what he wanted, he was a very hot-tempered man and in his anger he touched my sore spots and relatives (we live in my house).

At some point, he moved away, was always with the party team, didn’t take me with him, and once didn’t even come to spend the night, didn’t answer calls. I'm at home with two children, endless laundry, cleaning, no help from him. Emotionally I completely moved away; he was no longer interested in me. In fact, it was as if I had died then, test-antibiotic.com, any outburst of tenderness caused aggression in him.

I went to work, started taking care of myself, got slimmer, went to exercisesport . At some point, I started chatting with a guy online, I don’t know how it happened (having been married for 5 years, there was no communication with the opposite sex at all for any reason). Then I started lookingsex on the Internet, because in life I was generally not ready to communicate with a real man who is nearby, to be honest, and I’m not ready now. She began to masturbate and get orgasms, her eyes sparkled. Some kind of fire appeared in life. Everything works out, and I devote time to work and to my children.

My husband is always dissatisfied and found out about mycommunication of an intimate nature, I suffered a lot, I said: “let’s get a divorce.” It's been ours for two years nowlife is crumbling before the children's eyes. I'm asking for a divorce and at the same time I'm scared. We don’t communicate for weeks, I spend the night with my sisters, I sit late at work so as not to cross paths. I don't remember him at all. He is outraged by this. I have no thoughts of calling my husband or writing test-antibiotic.com. I remember him only when he makes himself known. Nowmy husband wants everything to be as it was before. And I understand that it won’t be the same as before. He became a different person.

I'm confused and don't understand what to do. I want a man to like me, to love me, to care for me, to admire me. I'm by naturethe girl is gentle, sensitive, I give doubly all my warmth. And with him there is one negative thing, I myself don’t notice how I fade away with him. He loves me cheerful, open, affectionate and at the same time does not allow me to be like that.