I don't see a future with my boyfriend

I do not know what to do? My boyfriend and I have been living together for over a year. Everything seemed normal at first, but now we have a crisis. I don't understand him, he doesn't understand me. The problem is that he constantly lies, to everyone and to me. This really pisses me off, and then he says that he won’t do it again, but still everything repeats.

Then we faced the problem of lack of money. I was sick, left work, and now I haven’t worked for a couple of months, when I recovered I started looking. But while something doesn’t work out, he constantly reproaches me for it. Only, since we stay at home alone all day, it will definitely drive me out. He does everything to spite me on purpose. He makes me hysterical, crying. He humiliates me with words in public, where I cannot answer him, it is very offensive. And this all repeats itself almost every other day.

We've been together for 4.5 years, we've been through a lot. And I love him, but I can’t change anything. We talked a lot with him, he seems to understand everything, promises that there will be no more test-antibiotic.com, but a couple of days pass and everything is the same. And everything I did, ignored, and was offended, but nothing changed. Of course, I would like to teach him a lesson and leave him, but I have no place. We rent an apartment in the city, our parents live in the village. I can’t go home, there are no robots there. There is no price to rent an apartment. And my friends are no longer in the city either, I no longer communicate with them. I just live in some kind of my own world, in which I am often humiliated, offended, and I cannot get out of it. I sit at home all the time, we rarely go out, he is constantly at work. I can't do this anymore. I’m very tired of this, I constantly want to cry and scream at the whole world. I told my mother a little about all this, but not everything. But she doesn't know what to advise me. When we arrive home, of course, she says something to him. But he still does it his way.

And I can no longer react calmly to him, I test-antibiotic.com became hysterical. I rush at him when he calls me names, I want to beat him, I’ll hit him (I very often want to hit him, although I try to restrain myself, but he deliberately does everything to make me do it, and then he admits it himself) , and in return he twists my arms, pushes me, hurts me. Now I don’t like much of what he does, I can yell at him myself. And that's my problem. I just become a downtrodden wild animal. I feel sorry for myself. Our parents constantly live in quarrels, but they are already 40 years old, and we are 22 and 27, and we have already completed ourrelationship to a dead end. And this cannot continue. Sometimes I didn’t even want to live, he just drove me crazy, it felt like he loved me, but didn’t respect me one bit. Either he loves only when he is in a good mood, or when he is neededsex . And this is what I manipulate. No other way.

When I threaten sex, only then does he blow away the dust from me. But only he test-antibiotic.com will get his, and then everything starts all over again. And he himself wanted to leave me, but he couldn’t. It has become so critical in the last 2 months. Of course, we used to fight too, but not so often. I’m just sick of it, I want happiness and that’s all. If you don’t change anything now, then this will never end, it will only get worse, and I don’t think that the child we really want will change anything, although minethe guy is so confident. Maybe because of this I can’t even find a job, although I can’t sit at home anymore.