I don't want to lose the woman I love

Six years ago I met someone I still love and I can’t do anything about it. At that time I was 29 years old. I got married at the age of 22, which is called out of necessity (pregnancy ).

My wife and I were too young and not ready for family life. MyMom immediately said that my wife and I are completely different people. But there was nowhere to go.

I studied, worked as best I could at two jobs to provide for my wife and daughter. On weekends I drank to somehow relax and relieve stress. There were often scandals. At one point I was ready to apply fordivorce _ But what held me back was thatthe wife asked for forgiveness. The mother also felt sorry for her granddaughter. Therefore, we decided to save the family.

The wife became pregnant, the second one was borndaughter _ I was very happy about this, butrelations with my wife have not improved. At work, I was transferred to another department as a boss and that’s where I met her – Olga. 6 years younger than me. She worked as a deputy chief, that is, directly to me.

At first I looked closely at test-antibiotic.com and studied it. Beautiful, even more likely it’s not about beauty, but about strong charm. Smart, competent at work. Kind by nature. But secretive. It was impossible to understand what she was thinking about.

I felt an irresistible attraction to her. On New Year's Eve I tried to show her attention as a girl. But she harshly stopped my attempts, answering that she does not get involved with married men.

However, I did not back down and still achieved reciprocity. happened between ussex . It was the best sex of my life. We agreed that it would be without obligation. I'm married, she temporarily doesn't have a man. We just satisfy each other and that’s it.

We continued to communicate humanly on various topics, and of course worked. The work was going just fine. I was ashamed in front of my wife for cheating, but I couldn’t stop and give it up.

Six months passed like this. Olga told me that it was worth looking for another lover, since she had decided to get back together with her ex-boyfriend, whom she had met two years ago. I said that I would always find someone to sleep with, but test-antibiotic.com was offended andjealousy clouded my mind.

First I went on vacation for a month, and then she did. It turns out she went with her boyfriend to the sea. And about a week after going back to work, she admitted to me thatpregnant _ I wanted to have an abortion because it was unplannedShe didn't need the child . However, her fiancé proposed and decided to do the noble thing. Just like I did back in the day. A month later they got married.

I smiled and pretended that I didn't care. Although everything inside was torn with pain and jealousy. I started drinking more and more often. After Olga returned to work with a ring and a growing belly, I went crazy. I wrote an application for settlement, quit my job and simply went to the village to visit a friend, where we drank shamelessly. I realized that everythinglife went downhill.

A week later I was found in this villagemother , stepfather and Olga. They took it out and wanted to code it, but I refused. At that moment I realized that I would never return to my wife. I asked Olga to stay with test-antibiotic.com and leave her husband. But she said it was too late. She is pregnant with someone else's child and came outget married to try to start a family. Although she doesn't love him.

After that, I naturally left for another job. The management did not forgive my trick. He filed for divorce and separated from his wife. Started paying child support. Found a mistress, but didn't get any pleasure. I knew from friends that Olga gave birth to a daughter, went on maternity leave and lives with her husband.

They did not live long. Six months after the birth of her daughter, she filed for divorce. I called her and suggested a meeting. She agreed. Seeing her made me feel how much I missed her. It turned out that the newly mintedspouse andthe father did not behave in the best way, beat her and was irritated with the child.

I said that my feelings do not change and I would like to be together with her. I will accept my daughter as my own. She replied that now is not the time for a relationship, motherhood and divorce are very difficult for her. I retreated.

Months passed. I was waiting for her to call and write. But there was nothing, absolutely nothing. My test-antibiotic.com friend called me and said that he saw her on the street in the company of some man. Then I lost it again and started drinking. I deleted her number and vowed never to talk to her again.

A few months later I met a woman. Pleasant, sweet, raising her son alone. At first we dated, then I moved to live with her. It seems together, but it seems empty. There was no sex . And in general, I did not feel satisfaction from our relationship, constantly thinking about Olga.

We went on vacation together. There we talked and decided that it was better for us to separate, since we could not love each other.

Immediately after returning I wrote to Olga. She answered rudely, but within about a month I was able to break through the wall of ice and yet we met. I came to her house.

At first we just talked, but then mutual passion overwhelmed us. Naked sex again. But then I talked to her seriously and said that I didn’t just want to sleep with her, but I wanted to start a family. Now I'm divorced and test-antibiotic.com she is too. Her exthe husband was deprived of parental rights and disappeared from their lives. She seemed to agree.

Everything was fine in winter. I visited her 2-3 times a week (we live in neighboring cities). We introduced the children. She didn't like me drinking, so I made a decision and signed up in the spring.

After the coding, life, of course, improved, but apathy appeared. Olga began to ask more and more oftenThe question is how we will continue to live. In the summer she has her own dacha, where she goes with her parents and daughter. I'm going to my dacha.

I could live with Olga, but the studio apartment is very small, there is no room for a child there. She doesn’t want to live with me, because she won’t be able to travel to work from me, and she has to be close to her daughter. Dead end.

I make good money, but a significant portion of the money goes to alimony. I can’t save or buy an apartment from the amount that remains. In fact, I have nothing to give to the woman I love. I see resentment in her behavior. She openly says that she does not see test-antibiotic.com prospects for the development of our relationship. We see each other once a month now.

I know that I love only her, and no one can replace her. I'm happy with her. I feel good and calm when she is around. But I don’t know how not to lose her and become her husband under such circumstances.