I don't want to take my mother with me

I don't like minemother . Now I say these words without experiencing any internal shame, because I realized that I have the moral right to do so.

All my childhood (there are three of us), that I remember, wemy mother systematically humiliated me, called me the most vile words, beat me, without understanding whether it was oursguilt . Sometimes she went tobinge for two weeks, then we could take a walk “from the heart”, when she was sober, she practically didn’t let us go outside. I remember how often my sister and I looked out the window: it’s summer, the sun is out, our peers are walking, and all we can do is look out the window. When she drank, she became aggressive, often did not control herself and beat us badly. I remember how I came from the street in the winter (walking), I was 7-8 years old, she drunkenly attacked me and beat me with a stick, beat off all my hands, then I couldn’t undo the buttons on my coat. She hit hard with whatever came to hand and was often sober (she could not drink for three years).
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My sister was often told that she should not have been born, she simply failed to have an abortion. We are born from different fathers. She did not get along with any of them because of her despotic nature. Now we're adults, I'm doneuniversity , outgot married , gave birth to a child. My sister and I live in the same city. My brother hanged himself 10 years ago at the age of 29. My mother lives in the village where we grew up - it’s not far from our city. She is an old sick woman, she needshelp and care, but I have great difficulty being close to her, her mere presence annoys me. I earn good money and help her financially and physically. The house has all the necessary conditions for a comfortable stay. I visit her quite often, and I also often bring her to my place, where she makes scandals and tries to humiliate myhusband . Here I left my daughter (9 years old) to stay with her for three days, afterThe daughter said that she called her names and even grabbed her by the hair. I won't leave my daughter with her anymore. Now with test-antibiotic.com I’m waiting for winter with trepidation, my mother asks to come to us for the winter (she spent almost all of her last winters with us - it’s hell) and says that it’s hard for her to be alone in the house. I want to refuse her - I can’t imagine how to survive another winter with her. My husband is also against it, he said that it would be better for us to go every other day and help.

She told everything in general terms, without the most horrific details that took place. Has anyone had anything similar to how you buildrelationship with your mother, what’s going on in your soul?