The guy knows that I'm pregnant, but he's marrying someone else

After my first confession about my stepfather, who destroyed everything, I am writing a sequel.

And so I left school without even finishing 9th grade and went to work as a waiter. Time passed quickly, I turned 17 years old,The money I earned went to no one knows where. Let me tell you briefly about my older brother, he is 5 years older and he is a Muslim. He was strict with me since childhood, I was afraid of him like fire. After he left to study in Moscow, he didn’t come back for 5 years and constantly told me not to disgrace him, not to do anything stupid, he meant not to date boys.

At the age of 16, I worked in one of the establishments and there was only one person who worked with us there.guy , and it so happened that I literally had nowhere to go to spend the night after work. We talked to him, I don’t know, maybe he guessed that I had nowhere to go, and we spent the night in the same cafe of his friend, but without any intimacy. We started dating, he helped me find an apartment, but I didn’t have enough test-antibiotic.com money, and we often stayed there overnight. It was winter, it was terribly cold there, and we warmed ourselves in an embrace, and during the day we went to work and so on for almost a month. Then it finally came to closeness, but I don’t fully know what I was thinking, but everything was like in a fog, I still regret it to this day because I live in Tajikistan and it’s customary for us to go out as a girlmarried _ But if there was no such situation in life, then this stupid act did not exist.

I found an apartment, took my mother away from my stepfather, and we began to live in a place, and I myself broke up with that guy because he was not my person and I understood that I had done something stupid in life. Mothershe drank and left the house, how much I suffered with her! I worked and worried about her, so a couple of years passed, I turned almost 19, and because of my last communication with that guy, I didn’t let anyone get close to me and no one knew about the intimacy that I had, even at work. Brother test-antibiotic.com never came; he lived there with a girl and no help could be expected from him. At the most difficult moment, if you asked for a penny, he couldn’t, so he sent me pitiful pennies. Over time, I stopped asking him for something, he didn’t know how I lived, and what I endured, he just always talked about honor and that’s all. At that moment, having become independent, I had seen a lot and somehow no longer felt for himfear , but only resentment.

Then I met a guy who is 9 years older than me. He was quite handsome, from a wealthy family, did not drink, did not smoke, had a good education, and was a Tajik by nationality. We just talked, I didn’t like him as a guy. And after another walk, he gave me a ride home and in the car, when we kissed, he thought I was a girl, but that day we slept, although again for so long I was disgusted to think about intimacy, and I regretted the first time , but that day was like a fog. Then we started dating test-antibiotic.com and he found out that I hadmy mother drinks, then my mother and I separated, I rented an apartment with the girls, he began to help me financially, although I initially knew that his parents were getting married. In the third year of the relationship, I became pregnant, had an abortion, then after 3-4 months I had to terminate it againpregnancy , he said that now is not the time, that there is no apartment. I didn’t insist because I understood that I couldn’t bear a child on my own. He always said that I would become his second wife, but I know that for life being the second and his parents recognizing him will not give me peace. His mother is also a character, everyone at home is afraid even of herhusband , and over time she looked for a bride for him. He refused or he simply didn’t like girls.

Time passed, he decided everything was mineproblems , I understood that I needed to end this before it was too late, then it would be more painful, I was worried about all my mistakes and about abortions, I didn’t think that this would happen in my life. And then I found out that they had arranged a bride for him and test-antibiotic.com he agreed. Then at that time there was still a pregnancy, we often argued, I asked to break up every time, then he said that he asked his mother to refuse, he did not want to get married, but his mother said that they were poorfamily and have already made repairs. It was inconvenient to refuse and they literally forced him, and I find out that againpregnant _ You will think, why didn’t you protect yourself? But because he didn’t love, and I, stupid, didn’t take it seriously, although I told him every time after 2 abortions, suddenly there would be consequences, and I wouldn’t be able to have children anymore.

Yes, I have no meaning in life: work, home, and worries, but time passes, I have no friends, I don’t want to go anywhere, I just spent time with a guy and got so used to him. And then who knows, I’ll be healthyrelationshipor not, because now everything is not perfect, but in a friend, after this relationship, I would have gone on a binge and hated everything around me. I love children, I have long wanted a family with not much income and test-antibiotic.com children, takes care of my family, because in my childhood I did not have a complete family, so I wanted to build one early on. It was hard for me to make a decision, because I don’t have an apartment, I work myself, my salary is small. I left the child until the 3rd month, the family don’t know how my brother will take it, I don’t know, he’ll refuse me, maybe he’ll reject me. Although on the one hand no one helped me when I was having a hard time with my mother, the same brother did not answer my SMS when I complained and asked for help. It’s so hard for me now, I don’t know how I’m going to raise a child. Tomorrow is my child's father's wedding, and after the wedding they are leaving for Dubai for their honeymoon. Everything inside is turning over, When I think about this, it’s a shame because I, too, would like to be born into a family where I would be looked after in everything until I got married and then get married with honor. I don’t know what awaits me tomorrow with my child, because I’m 20 years old now. Who will marry me with a child?