Moving to the capital changed my life for the worse

I am 21 years old, I moved from a provincial city with my parents to study at the capital’s university. I chose the university myself,my family helped me in every possible way and is helping me, but now I want to change something: live separately, realizing my plans and not depend on my parents and help them rather (I’m latechild and one in the family). And I understand that for this I only need to act. My goal is not related to the direction at the university, and I try to combine everything so as not to waste time.

But everything I want didn’t turn out to be so easy in reality. Problems with the perception of the world began after the move. Too frequent reflection, analysis of the behavior of people in my city and in the capital led me to the complete absence of my company. It seems to me that all my peers here are not the same as in my hometown, they are more ill-mannered and arrogant, closed and most often angry.

Of course, it’s rash to speak for everyone; perhaps I was just unlucky, or this is a problem in my head. Chance meetings and acquaintances always ended on the same day and test-antibiotic.com did not continue as friendshipsrelationship , because either I understood that this person was not my field, or I often experienced rejection and lack of initiative towards me, which naturally affected my self-confidence. I stopped looking for potential friends and closed myself off like never before. Yes I only have onegirlfriend is here, but I don't feel like it's enough for me.

My dream involves constant connections with people, but now it feels like I’m just in an emotional vacuum. I used to sincerely enjoy the sun, the time of year, a cherry tree growing in the garden, a telephone conversation, a regular walk in the forest, a trip, and any little things always lifted my spirits and caused a storm of emotions. But the most unpleasant thing is that it affected my hobbies and studies. Nothing new excites me, ideas are not generated as before, everything is somehow forced and there is no enthusiasm. Even in dreams I experience everything more vividly than in reality. Now, of course, I can laugh at something, be happy about something, but more often than not I am silent and test-antibiotic.com experience something subdued - it’s comparable to eating bland food or unripe fruit, and from - because of this, it seems to me that I am becoming wildly boring, which prevents me from building relationships.

Before moving, I can’t say that I was an ardent extrovert; most often I met through someone or on social media. networks, I didn’t consider it shameful to write to someone first, to speak first, I had my own company andgirlfriends and buddies, which gave me confidence and generally made me happier. Of course, we keep in touch, but we don’t see each other that often.

Now it seems to me that I am not quite where I should be, the feeling that all opportunities for fulfillment and acquaintances are slipping out of my hands. It seems that somewhere I don’t reach the desired social circle, but here it’s not particularly comfortable. These prejudices and low emotional sensitivity to all actions awaken apathy and reluctance to do anything at all. The fixed thought that “the more you do, the further you will go” does not leave me, but is not perceived as motivation. I'm terribly tired of this condition, I thought it was something test-antibiotic.com temporary, but I havefear that this is now forever.