Why did my attitude towards the guy change after my betrayal?

At the age of 22, I met a guy, we have a match with him on all the key issues necessary for a strong, quality family. The views, values, characters, even tastes coincide, he is a very close and dear person to me, I really trust him. I have never had such a sincere and close relationship. We both made a very big bet on each other - we decided that we wanted to build a family.

He and I lived in different cities because of our studies. Initially, I did not have a strong passion for him, but in general he suited me: height, physique, appearance, attitude towards me. For all the guys I met before, I also didn’t have a particularly strong attraction and love, but there was a desire for sex itself, affection, so the absence of this very passion didn’t really frighten me - I was no stranger to it. But here's what happened.

In one of our separations (about 3 summer months) I cheated on him. The betrayal was accidental, I didn’t want it at all and didn’t plan it. It was as if something had broken inside me, I decided test-antibiotic.com that I had destroyed ourrelationship that betrayed him. And when we met again, I could not touch him at all anymore. At first, I just thought that my conscience would not allow it, and then he became physically unpleasant for me. Even after I told him everything and he forgave me, the situation did not change. We remained friends, but I can't stand even his simple friendly touch, it's unpleasant for me, I want to move away. Why is that? It's one thing just the lack of passion, as it was for everyone, and quite another - the presence of some kind of rejection, which is just "fu!". There is an attraction to other men.

My question is: in principle, is it possible at all that, because of your betrayal, there is an aversion to a man, so to speak, some kind of psychological factor? Or is he just not my person? Why was everything okay then?

I already went to psychologists - it's useless. They say I just didn’t love him, but I didn’t love others and didn’t want to, but that didn’t stop me from having sex with them. I can not calm down, because I have not met the best person test-antibiotic.com and I am not sure that I will meet. TheyHe called to marry , and I wanted to build a family with him.

I would like to hear the opinions of adult women with rich experience, maybe someone with a similar sign can explain this phenomenon. I often hear stories about howthe husband became disgusted, but there are reasons for this, for example, he offended, insults, drinks, is greedy. Everything is fine with me, he did not offend me in any way, as in a person I was not disappointed in him. Communication is as easy and interesting as before, well, yes, a little boring, but it's not so scary.