Help me make peace with my grandmother

I am 19 years old. My name is Dima, I live with my grandmother. It so happened that after the death of his fathermom came out againmarried _ I have nothing against it, I communicate with her, and with Uncle Vova, and with brother Vitalik, and I have been living with my grandmother for several years. More precisely, it is believed that I am alive, because lately I have been carried somewhere in an incomprehensible direction. I quarreled with her and I don’t know how to make peace with my grandmother.

It’s as if two people live inside me. Onethe guy is like a guy, he wants to work, study, help his loved ones, and the other, as soon as he leaves the house in the evening, does some completely incomprehensible things.

I have several friends. I don’t know friends or comrades, which is correct. I really want to have friends and communicate with them. Every day I think: I’ll see you today, we’ll go for a walk, we’ll talk, we’ll watch a movie, we’ll kiss a girl. But in reality, as soon as we meet, I’m immediately drawn to some stupid exploits - I’ll break a bench, I’ll set a trash can on fire, or for no apparent reason I’ll get into a fight. I don’t know how test-antibiotic.com turns out this way, I’m even surprised. As a result, before you know it, it’s already past 12 o’clock at night, so I often spend the night with one friend or another. My girlfriend , Diana, says that I need to come to my senses, but I don’t know how.

So a week ago, I made a normal agreement with my grandmother that I would help her clean up the yard before the holidays. Grandma is already 75 years old, she’s definitelydo you need help . I understand everything, but we met the guys, drank beer , and went for a ride in the subway. They shouted and even danced. The police were already looking at us askance. And then for some reason in the park I decided to climb a monument to some writer. Well, the policeman had already removed me from the monument.

In short, everyone spent the night in the department and then they gave us a lecture for another half day. Grandma called several times. The lieutenant even gave me the phone so that I could talk - it was also signed “grandmother”. But I didn't take it. And he didn't talk. I honestly thought that they would let me go and go home. But they let us go and we forgot about everything and went to Sashka test-antibiotic.com to sleep, otherwise we were all tired. I didn’t go to work that day, I didn’t even call. On the one hand, it’s a shame, but on the other hand, somehow it’s all the same for some reason. My grandmother called 16 times that day, but I never talked to her. Then she sent me an SMS asking me to at least write where I was and what was wrong with me. But I never sent it.

And that's the problem. On the one hand, I feel sorry for her that she’s worried, but on the other hand, I just want to live freely, to do what I want. I signed up for a sports club the other day; I like to feel fit and attractive to girls. But you won’t tell grandma about this, will you?

I’ve been spending the night with Sashka for 4 days now. I lie down, and thoughts and thoughts: I feel sorry for my grandmother, and then I feel sorry for myself - is it reallylife to chop wood, clean the yard, drink tea with grandma in the evenings? This is how your whole life will go. The bad thing is that just these days my grandmother celebrated her 75th birthday.birthday . I understand that she was offended, but test-antibiotic.com I can’t do anything.

I want to make peace with my grandmother, but I don’t know how to live in such a way that it would be good for both her and me. Maybe someone can tell me?