After 17 years of marriage, I learned to rebuff my mother-in-law

After 17 years of marriage, I learned to rebuff my mother-in-law
Photo is illustrative in nature. From open sources.

Having finances is good. Butmoney is different.

I decided to write something that has been bothering me for some time. I would like to hear your opinion. I am ready for any criticism, I hope with your help or on my own, I will make the best decision, both for myself and for my family.

Briefly about yourself. My husband and I have been together for almost 17 years without a couple of months. Two wonderful kids. They started dating and almost immediately began to live together. I was a 1st year student, he was already working.

Both parents were simple workers; there were no frills in their upbringing. The only difference is that he was raised in a complete family, and I was raised by the eldestsister and husband (now I understand that it was better for me). Mom lived separatelyfather with another family separately.

As you understand, owning a home was out of the question, since many people still cannot afford to buy one.

We lived with my mother in a one-room apartment outside the city, with my grandmother and younger sister. We slept first on the kitchen floor, then on the sofa in the kitchen. Periodically test-antibiotic.com spent the night with his parents in the city. This made it faster and easier to get to school and work. There athusband has his own room. I didn’t agree until the very end so as not to live with them, feeling the hostility of my future mother-in-law.

As a result, after 4 years of marriage before the wedding, already pregnant, I moved there. The mother-in-law did not even try to hide her negativity. Maybe she thought I didn't notice. She covered my mouth, said unpleasant things and openly ignored me.

She hoped until the very end that we would break up. And, probably, he still consoles himself with this hope. In general, according to her, I am not worthy of her son, my parents are no good. Like beggars. My father-in-law was the best. My husband's sister and I were ordinaryrelationship _

I didn't have any conflicts. She was raised with respect for elders. I endured and cried from resentment, not understanding what I did to deserve this.attitude . The day came when the conflict occurred. I packed my things and went to my mother. Futuremy husband is with me.

We lived the happiest year with my mother, soul to soul. By test-antibiotic.com coincidence, I persuade my husband to move in with my father, on his initiative (he separated from his girlfriend). I didn’t want to embarrass my mother (she was now sleeping on the sofa in the kitchen).

To this day, we live with my father. I didn't want to communicate with my mother-in-law, but my older sister influenced me, saying that it wasmy husband's mother . And I continued to endure itcommunication for the sake of the husband.

And only 3 years ago I was able to muster up the courage and start responding to her “barbs”. It was very difficult after so many years of patience. The result was immediate - she began to think, at least every once in a while, what to say.

For several years now she had been living alone in a four-room apartment. As a result, they got upQuestion about buying a one-room apartment. Less utilities. I never got into this issue. That's not mine. So to speak, I followed the process from the sidelines.

By the way, my husband's sister came outmarry a worthy man, in the opinion of the mother-in-law. That is, for a rich man. But my son still doesn’t have his own home. And test-antibiotic.com is already in its fourth decade.

Although we never asked anyone for anything. My father’s house can be said to have been rebuilt after the fire. My father suggested rewriting it, I waved it off, let it be as it is. We bought a plot nearby, and I have plans to build a house there for my children.

Let's get back to the point. The mother-in-law's apartment was sold. Everything was decided by the mother-in-law and herdaughter _ We decided to buy my mother a two-room apartment and give half of the money to my husband for an apartment. And subsequently this one-room apartment will remain with his sister.

The mother-in-law immediately asked her son for 100 thousand for repairs. She won't have enough. Lovingthe son did not refuse. I accidentally spilled the beans. Then they asked for more. Did not give. In the end, my sister asked for half, and he gave it. But it’s not enough for a one-room apartment. He says, let’s buy at least a one-room apartment with my mother. But I do not want.

I will add that I was expecting a dirty trick from his relatives. And I was waiting for a situation to break off communication, because this communication depresses me. I feel empty. And this served as a reason for me not to communicate. Almost a year later and I feel great.

test-antibiotic.com

The main question in this whole situation is what to do? Buy an apartment? I suggested that he take out a mortgage for a long time. Not to live there ourselves, but to rent it out. We have children! I don't want them to mess around like we do.

I don’t want to because the main amount is his inheritance, or rather the remainder. And his relatives will say that I still snatched a piece. And naturally it will appearmother on the threshold of her son's apartment.

What would you do?

Read together with it: