After the betrayal, only pain and resentment remained

I'm writing my story just to vent.

At the age of 20 I leftmarry the man you love. The marriage started out wonderful, but then, like everyone else, lifeproblems with money, relatives and work. Scandals, swearing, dissatisfaction with each other, and as a result - prolonged silence.

In the 14th year of married life, unable to cope with the accumulated problems, I drank too much alcohol and slept with a colleague. It was impossible to hide it, and all hell broke loose. My husband beat a colleague repeatedly, and he beat me when he was drunk. The relationship has become hell. He hated me, insulted me, humiliated me, put moral pressure on me, swore at me, and despised me. The hot stage lasted almost two years, another five years after they tried to establishrelationships and save the family.

I did everything for him to beg and earn trust, but in response there was cold hatred and contempt. When I tried to say something and explain that I couldn’t handle everything alone, and in response I heard: “Why do I owe you anything in general? You are completely impudent with your claims! You had to show off in front of your lover, and not in front of me, the test-antibiotic.com creature is not grateful.”

The husband began to drink, began to be jealous and controlling. For any word contrary to humiliation and insults, the drunk periodically beat me again. For any refusal of anything, he began to destroy him morally, he could leave drunk, and then the drunk man would beat him again. From refusing sex, in general, he became furious, yelling and throwing verbal mud.

For five years we tried to improve our relationship, and then he was sent on a business trip. He was gone for two weeks, didn’t answer the phone, didn’t answer messages, and then he arrived calm, peaceful and satisfied. Calmly, looking into my eyes, he told me that he had taken revenge on me, that he had been living with a colleague for two weeks.husband andwife that she has the same problem in her family. He said that now everything has healed, burned off, and I can do whatever I want and go wherever and to whomever I want. And a week later he left, filed fordivorced and began to live with that woman.

So, now he is happy and lives with her, and for him I am the last creature who cheated, lied, screwed up with sex and only test-antibiotic.com swung my license, he says so. I’ve been on antidepressants for a year now, and I’m going crazy from the pain. I understand that it’s my own fault, but it still hurts and hurts, and I still love her.