I broke up with my boyfriend because of his inattention and eternal lack of money.

I am 20 years old. From the age of 16 I dated a young man, the firstlove , first serious onesrelationship _ We broke up in the spring, couldn’t come to terms with his attitude, and left. The reason was this male inattention, constant lateness, excuses not to meet, lack of money, but worse, the reluctance to earn it at 22 years old.

When they were leaving, they might not communicate for several days, not call each other at all, might not congratulate me on the holiday, as was the case this New Year , he just quickly went to see his friends and didn’t even call me, didn’t call me since the morning of the first, congratulated me only in the evening.

And they didn’t celebrate together, since I left with my family, although no, I wanted to stay in Moscow and celebrate with him, but he said that he would be the first to go to the dacha for three days to celebrate a friend’s birthday . Naturally, it would not have been possible to take me. We broke up because he seriously offended me, did what I warned him not to do, I said in advance that this would upset me very much and wouldquarrel _ There was no quarrel. She just didn't answer him. And he didn’t even write test-antibiotic.com. I went to the dacha for a whole week. He returned and wrote how much he loved me. We met and I said that this is the end.

Had triedreturn , flowers and talk about his such strong love. We broke up many times. The first time was in the first year, when he said that he didn’t love and he needed to go out while he was young, and not build a stable relationship. After 2 months he crawled, sought me out and brought me back for a month, until I believed that he was mistaken. We broke up again for a week because he didn’t bring me pills to work. I had a job that I couldn’t leave, and there were no pharmacies nearby, no one had a pill, but I suddenly felt sick, they didn’t let me go home, I asked to bring him, go 2 stations by metro. He didn’t bring it, he said there was no home and no money.

We broke up on New Year's Day, and we were still breaking up when I met another guy and wanted to go to him. I constantly wanted to leave, I constantly felt bad, a constant feeling that I was not appreciated, not loved. Although there was also a lot of good test-antibiotic.com, it’s true. I constantly clung to this good thing, tried to turn a blind eye to its shortcomings, accepted it for what it is. I couldn’t accept one thing: indifference. I heard the following words from him: “I love you, really, with all my soul, but I can’t do it any other way, it doesn’t work out for me.” I left. I remember he wrote nasty things to me when he found out that I had someone, insulting me. Didn't apologize. Then he wrote as if nothing had happened. It frayed all my nerves.

But I'm afraid without him, I'm struggling to suffer, I'm afraid to love, I'm afraid to be with someone, I don't want to meet anyone for fear that I will be hurt. I was with him all the time, I thought he was minefamily and this is forever, from the earliest years together. And here I am alone. Without him. Every place reminds me of him, I just want to be happy, to receive in return what I give, to feel loved, finally. How should it be in a relationship? Why can't I let go? How can you even love someone if it only hurtspain test-antibiotic.com and leaves scars on the soul?