The guy is satisfied with a civil marriage and does not want to get married
I am 22 years old, my man is 21 years old. We have been dating for almost 5 years. It turned out that we started living about six months later (as it seems to me now, it was a recklessact , it happened too early).
We have been living this way for some time now, or rather several years. Initially we lived in a communal apartment, then in a rented apartment. We have a common budget, everyone contributes half, there were times when I invested more and sometimes I do. He only has a salary, I have a salary and he also helpsfather . Recently my father bought me an apartment. We have been living in it for two months now. Just before the move, my boyfriend said that he didn’t want to move becausethe apartment is mine and even offered to just live separately, but also meet. I told him that in this case it would be a step back. And that in this case, separation is the way out. He got scared and still moved. But at every opportunity she reminds me that the apartment is mine. Actually, what’s the problem, I recently started thinking about marriage. We had a big fight, and test-antibiotic.com I asked him to move out, he brought me back, but I decided to ask aboutmarriage . Why? Because we have never raised this topic before. This was never discussed. If the topic was raised, it was indirectly and from the outside. And each time it immediately closed, remaining unnoticed by him. He would immediately stop talking or not voice his thoughts. He once said that you can only get married if you have your own home. And that those who get married without their own home and have nowhere to take their wife are fools. That children at such an age as ours are unplanned and that at that age only frivolous people give birth to them. At the same time, everything is arranged like in a family. But the marriage itself is not.
He often talks about plans, but I don’t appear there. He says what kind of car he wants (he will take it forcredit , by the way). He says what kind of education he wants to get, what kind of job he wants. At the same time, he does not voice what he sees regarding us. He loves to relax at the seaside, he even asked test-antibiotic.com me to quit my job for a vacation, but at the same time, he is not ready to support me. Just temporarily until I find a job again. And he believes that a woman should work. If he has any large bonuses, he does not invest them in the house, but only in vacations or for our clothes. The most important thing is that he answeredquestion about marriage. I asked him when he planned, and he replied: “I plan to get married when I have my own place.” I asked: “You have an apartment, are you going to buy a car. You don’t take any action to buy an apartment, when are you going to buy it and get married?” He replied: “I don’t know for sure” and laughed.
The next conversation took place 2 days later because he started talking about the car again. We had a fight. I said that I wasn’t going to live in a “civil marriage” for 5-7 years and I wasn’t going to wait either. I need to know the timing. Specific deadlines. Otherwise we are going nowhere. He said there was no need to wait for anything, and I went crazy. When we moved away from the quarrel, he told test-antibiotic.com the following thing: “I see you in the future, I’m planning marriage. You won’t have to wait 5 years, but I can’t say when.”
He also used to travel to other countries all the time for work. Now there is no such possibility. He began to travel to play hockey in an amateur league (he himself is a former professional hockey player). They play and drink there. Previously, he was against traveling with friends. He himself traveled only for work and did not let me in. Now he began to think that he and his friends could go away for a couple of days and see the city. This came as strange news to me. I have a strong feeling that the person simply doesn’t want any wedding. And he doesn't plan to. He feels good with me, the system seems to be working. And it’s not even a matter of age, but the fact that he doesn’t see me as his wife. I felt disgust and distrust. It became humiliating for me to live like this, not to mention having sexual relations. I feel like I've been rented.
Read together with it:
- Unexpected meeting with ex-boyfriendI am 23 years old. From the age of 17 to 21 I had my firstLove . We were like we looked perfect from a movie. The relationship is perfect. These were precisely those feelings that did not cool down, despite the time. But at 19 I get pregnant. I tell him about this, and he says that I need to have an...
- My loneliness and emptiness in my soulI don’t remember a time when I could call my family prosperous in terms of the psychological climate at home, but until that year, at least we maintained the level of strong, needy “middle peasants” financially.Living together was not comfortable, even though each family member was assigned a room. ...
- My husband got me into huge debts by taking out loansI met a guy who later became my husband; he was from a wealthy family at that time. He insisted on me leaving work, motivating that I should take care of my family and children in the future.I was 100% confident in him, he carried me in his arms. But as soon as we got married, strange situations beg...
- A friend's advice helped save the marriageI am 37 years old, my husband is 32. When I met him, I already haddaughter from her first marriage.I didn’t live long with my first husband. Tired of constant betrayal and lies, I got divorced and decided that I would raise my daughter myself. But over time, everything was forgotten, and I met Oleg....
- Reward for ForgivenessBy 2000, my parents left me without a roof over my head, saying: “It’s okay, you’ll earn money yourself.” Where can a doctor in our country earn an apartment?I wandered around strange corners for 10 years, rented rooms with hostesses, and earned money. I was able to save a little and was looking for...
- My father kicked me out of the house, and now I have to take him in with meDad raised us as best he could alone. Me, sister and brother. My grandmother also helped as much as possible with her pension. We lived in my mother's apartment.When I was 17 years old, my grandmother died and upon completion she left me an apartment, andfather thought thatthe apartment will be his....
- The husband left for a barren girlWe started dating my husband while still in college. We lived together for 10 years and gave birth to a long-awaited daughter. He didn’t let her go, he got up at night, walked, and at home he could play with her for hours. I was treated for a long time before I was able to get pregnant, and that’s w...