My unfulfilled dream

Here I am sitting on a bench near an old castle, looking at the water, at the huge bridge and thinking. There is no spark in me, inside: melancholy, emptiness, life, as if frozen, and everything was covered with dust. The beauty around me does not fascinate me, communication with other people does not bring me pleasure, I avoid it as much as possible so that I would not be considered crazy. I think the people around them also feel it, they don’t realize it, maybe, but they feel it. Talking to a dead person is like talking to a stone, simple, unambiguous sentences that barely coverthe indifference of your empty soul. This emptiness was not created by me on purpose, it scares me even more than others. I thought a lot, what is the reason for its appearance, and it took me quite a long time to understand that it was about love.

Love is the mystery of humanity, a huge force that can revive a person, give him hope, strength, motivate him to do great, impossible things. Someone correctly said: “Love rules the world”, she and only she turns this planet, makes you create, perform feats, do incredible things. Love is the best thing test-antibiotic.com can give a person to another person, Motherland, God. And I'm not capable, which means I'm dead. The real walking dead. Wherever and with whomever I am, everything is the same. Nothing makes sense. What to do? I don't know. Fall in love? I can not. Actually exactlylove brought me here. I wanted to go to the concert of one rock band whose guitarist has been in my head for more than eight years.

I was still a schoolgirl then, I went around in ripped jeans with a high waist, in a denim jacket and sneakers. And, of course, I played the guitar, or rather learned to play. My older brother supported my interest in every possible way, he gave me cuts with music and videos of famous musicians, guitar virtuosos, and once gave me his “former” electric guitar. It was an event in my life, but an even bigger event was the discovery for me of the very group that I also discovered thanks to my brother on the very disks that he gave me. I was delighted! Once I watched all 13 recorded clips on test-antibiotic.com, I called my best friend and buzzed her ears. She arrived and I showed her everything, since then August 31 officially began to be considered the day when I met him.

Since then, I could no longer live normally. I listened to themevery day , this group began to come across to me everywhere (as it happens when in love): on TV, on the radio, in magazines, in books. Although, in my country this group has never been popular, besides, this is a rather adult group, which, by the time I fell in love, as it seemed to me, was not active. But, as is customary for a person in love, I thought deep down that this was fate. No, it's not funny, it's scary, because no matter how much self-control a fan has, no matter how he denies the seriousness of his feelings, deep down he cherishes the hope of a magical meeting and admits the possibility of developing a love relationship.

It was the same with me, it's strange, you kind of admit the possibility of being with someone, chatting with guys, but deep down you're sure that test-antibiotic.com won't work, because your heart is already taken and there's nothing to be done about it . And it's okay that this person is three years older than you, that you live in different countries, that your parents will not survive this and that you know that you will never meet him. But sometimes, you admit the possibility that under fortunate circumstances (fantastically successful), somewhere on the street, maybe even in your own country, you will suddenly meet him, quite by chance, you will collide and he will drop something, and you help raise, and you'll get to know each other. And he suddenly realizes, feels and understands that you are his destiny. Well, that's enough! What a horror, it’s even a shame to imagine that sometimes I still imagine it.

In short, a lot of time has passed, I have already entered the university, and there I even fell in love with a classmate, but the love was not long and after a while we broke up. In the process of experiencing the emptiness formed inside, love for my guitarist flared up with renewed vigor. And I firmly decided - something must be done! I have already mentioned that my hero is not young, and by the time test-antibiotic.com was ripe for action, the group had not given concerts for several years. But, oh miracle! New album, and even with a support tour! I was in shock, nothing but fate! You need to get to one of the concerts in order not to become - I thought. I looked at how much less expensive it is for tickets, for a plane and housing (I'm not a rich person), but they were not going to call in my country, and began to make plans.

And I had big plans! Learn the language, make yourself no more, no less, but a goddess, buy tickets to the VIP zone, organize a trip, and all this in six months. Time is normal, but there is a lot to do. I started working and everything went like clockwork. Everything was just magical. There were people who shared connections, experience, valuable advice, someone began to run with me, everyone tried to help with textbooks, supported, of course, no one knew about the true plans, everyone thought that I was just flying on a trip during my vacation, everyone wondered what an active, purposeful person. Still would! test-antibiotic.com After all, I was driven by a dream and love. And everything went on as usual, but two months before the day X, I received a letter with a visa refusal. Something inside me broke. I lowered my hands and suddenly became a realist. I finished learning the language, stopped running,

I was offered to try to submit documents again, I applied and a month later received the coveted stamp in my passport, but oddly enough, I was not happy about it. As the saying goes: "Everything will be, you just have to lose desire." I suddenly realized all my insignificance, there was a month left before the concert, and I was in terrible shape, I didn’t know the language, and I didn’t even buy a ticket, since I’m not flying. Do you think I started working like crazy, trying to catch up? Of course not. I continued to do nothing, but I bought tickets, though not to the VIP zone, but the cheapest ones, just to listen to my favorite music at least from the outside (of course, he should not have seen me like that).

And so 3 days before departure, I look at the map, make plans, download the test-antibiotic.com metro and you know what? I messed up the country! It turns out that the street on the second was a concert venue, named after another city and another country, and I didn’t even pay attention! I was sure I was not even embarrassed by another currency! And none of those who helped me buy tickets understood this either. How so? 3 days before the concert. And here I am sitting in a foreign country, looking at a huge bridge washed by water, there are foreigners around, noise, and at that moment my favorite band is performing in another country, and in my pocket a ticket to a concert burns my thigh. Fate? I don't know, but I'll do my best to get on their next tour. You know what? Love and follow your love no matter where it takes you, it's the only thing that keeps us alive.