I feel used

I am 28 years old. In 2022 applied forDivorce from husband because he is toxicthe marriage has outlived its usefulness. There was everything - assault, insults, and conflicts with relatives. As a result, he was sent to a mental hospital

In three years and 7 months of marriage, I never cheated, despite the fact that he did not work and had a mental disorder. I tried to be the savior in the relationship. But in May, at work, I was overwhelmed by all this, and I got into a relationship with one guy, who a month later disappeared silently and did not say goodbye. Although I felt precisely in love with him.

In July, she filed for divorce, was depressed, smoked a lot and began to communicate with a person whom she had known for 1.5 years. He is a Muslim, 3 years younger,Our communication began with mutual antipathy and hatred. Then we talked, he went to his home. But he always said that I was a closed book to him. It so happened that I allowed him to gain my trust. She probably needed someone to vent to. We started calling each other test-antibiotic.com and chatting. I told him about the situation with my husband and the connection with that guy. And then he began to hint atto have sex , began to ask for intimate photos. And I sent it to him, despite my internal protest and disgust.

As a result, we agreed to meet on neutral territory in a city that was located 5 hours from my city and 9 hours from his. He rented an apartment, paid for the room, and organized everything romantically. The sex was amazing, but on a spiritual level I felt devastated, because I realized that I had destroyed communication and friendship with this person, with whom I could once easily communicate, joke and joke.

Before our meeting, he showed some signs of jealousy, did not believe, accused me of lying, etc., although we were not in a relationship. After intimacy, he asked: “Tell me honestly, did you come just because of sex?” But I said nothing. I didn’t know what to answer, since he himself emphasized that there couldn’t be many developments.

The next morning he was as cold as arctic ice and said that between us test-antibiotic.com there was only sex, casual. No one owes nothing to nobody. He didn't even kiss me goodbye. When I bought a bus ticket, I was shaking all over, I realized that he was using me, because I had previously been an inaccessible object. And now he predictably remains silent and ignores.

I so regret that without officially getting divorced, and not recovering from a toxic relationship, I got involved in all this, which almost destroyed my self-esteem. I regret that I allowed myself to cross the line and gave myself to this person who gained my trust and found out information about me. I feel like a dirty thing that has been used. He probably thought that IProstitute . Although before that we communicated in a very interesting and fun way. Now everything is different, he is completely gone. And finally he said to himself that he is a manipulator who loves to use women.

I'm saddened to tears that this happened to this person, and that my friendship is no longerreturn . It looks like I haven’t fully worked through my victim complex yet. Still looking for a new home, work, and so there are not enough messages from him and words of support. But test-antibiotic.com cannot be undone. I’m afraid that on an emotional level I became attached to him, although I understand with my mind that a decent person would not demand intimate photographs and do so. Travel 8 hours to sleep with a girl, pay for housing, organize a romantic dinner, so that later you don’t leave with the words: “only sex between us.” Even without hope of a further meeting.