I'm in despair about my appearance

I’m just screaming from the heart, I’m in despair, I don’t know what to do. The topic is banal and as old as the world, but it is very important to me.

I've been trying to lose weight for 3 years now and it's all in vain. It all started 3 years ago, when I moved from my parents to a hostel in another city (5,000 km). I remember my weight -56 kg. When I was admitted, I was visiting my grandmother and in a month and a half of summer I gained 57-58 kg. At that time I had not yet monitored my weight, I was happy with everything and thought that everything was fine, I only weighed myself during medical examinations at school, etc.

The first course and by winter I began to weigh 59, after the new year 63 kilograms. Once I came to visit a friend, and she had scales, I stood up as a joke, and when I saw the number, I was horrified! I immediately took action

After the New Year holidays, I went on a diet, started exercising every morning for 40 minutes, walking to work (about 5 km), the weight came off extremely slowly, I was hungry all the time and felt dizzy test-antibiotic.com, I started taking pills like activated carbon, they helped me not gain weight, since food was not digested.

In the summer, in July, I weighed myself and still exhaled a little, the weight was 60 kg. And I lost it! I won’t say that I started overeating, but I started eating everything that I hadn’t eaten before. I believed so much that the weight would now be the same, but that was not the case. At the end of autumn I got on the scales - 64 kg, after the New Year - 66. I was horrified, started the diet again, this time even stricter, and went to the gym 3 times a week for stretching with pumping and acrobatics. Three months of work, on the scales from 66 to 63! It's a shame. Very.

I cried a lot and looked for an answer to why the weight was creeping up so slowly. Then he stood up completely. I worked out, ate the same way, and he remained 63. At the beginning of this September, due to some circumstances I could not go to the gym, I exhaled a little, decided that everything was more or less back to normal, today I stepped on the scales - test-antibiotic.com 65!

Help. I'm desperate. What should I do? I'm very tired, I'm so tired of exhausting myself, I think about calories all the time, I really want to eat, and now I just hatesport . I would like to immediately clarify that I do not have a sedentary lifestyle, I work in the evening as a cleaner, our university is distance learning, and therefore during the day I travel, go to the mountains, walk in the city, etc.

I want to be slim so much, I really don’t like the way I look. I am 19 years old, with a height of 170, my weight is 65, but I would like to be 55. I read a lot about how this can be hereditary, the bone is heavy, and also about psychosomaticproblems , but honestly, I don’t believe much in it.

I ask for your advice, maybe you know what can be done? Because I’ve already run out of all the methods and options (diet, sports, etc. don’t help). All the best.